1
00:03:18,674 --> 00:03:20,843
Good luck, Sonny!
2
00:03:21,677 --> 00:03:24,055
Good job, Hooper!
3
00:03:31,771 --> 00:03:34,941
Okay, now, look alive.
Here comes the director.
4
00:03:43,157 --> 00:03:45,243
Did you have a good lunch?
5
00:03:54,377 --> 00:03:55,962
- You all set?
- Ready.
6
00:03:56,128 --> 00:03:57,922
Six-three, Louis.
7
00:04:00,299 --> 00:04:02,468
Okay, Hooper, stand by now.
We're about set.
8
00:04:08,349 --> 00:04:10,101
- Roll the cameras.
- Rolling, Jack.
9
00:04:10,268 --> 00:04:12,937
Scene two, take one, B camera. Marker.
10
00:04:15,731 --> 00:04:18,234
- We're ready to make the shot, Roger.
- Action.
11
00:04:18,401 --> 00:04:19,735
Action. Come on, Hooper.
12
00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:43,968
Cut! Did you get it?
13
00:04:44,135 --> 00:04:45,970
- Good.
- Print it.
14
00:04:46,137 --> 00:04:49,098
Let's get ready for the next setup.
Get the first team in there.
15
00:04:49,265 --> 00:04:51,017
Get me down, Joe.
16
00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:54,937
Don't move, Hooper! Don't move!
17
00:04:55,104 --> 00:04:58,232
- Need a picture, Jack? Booga-booga-booga!
- Hold still, Hooper.
18
00:04:58,399 --> 00:05:01,319
- You all right? Huh?
- Oh. Terrific.
19
00:05:01,485 --> 00:05:04,280
- I'm serious, now. You all right?
- I invented that stunt.
20
00:05:04,447 --> 00:05:06,908
There ain't nobody in the world
that does it better.
21
00:05:07,074 --> 00:05:09,869
- And you say that in all humility?
- I give great humble.
22
00:05:11,370 --> 00:05:13,456
- It's okay. Not a scratch.
- You sure?
23
00:05:13,623 --> 00:05:17,126
- I'm not talking about your ass.
- Okay, let's have the first team!
24
00:05:17,293 --> 00:05:20,922
- Oh. What would you give for a little of that?
- Two nipples for a dime.
25
00:05:22,298 --> 00:05:25,009
- Sonny, that was terrific.
- No, that's terrific.
26
00:05:25,176 --> 00:05:27,428
- Teach me to do that gag sometime.
- Ha, ha.
27
00:05:27,595 --> 00:05:30,056
He wants to learn how to do that.
What, are you crazy?
28
00:05:30,222 --> 00:05:31,891
I want to ride under trucks.
29
00:05:32,058 --> 00:05:34,143
- Come on, teach me some gags.
- Oh, for chrissake.
30
00:05:34,310 --> 00:05:37,772
- West, can I have you in position over here?
- Right away, Tony.
31
00:05:37,939 --> 00:05:39,440
I'll make a deal with you.
32
00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:41,567
I won't do any acting...
33
00:05:41,734 --> 00:05:44,445
- you don't do any stunts, okay?
- Adam, please?
34
00:05:46,072 --> 00:05:47,573
- Okay.
- Okay.
35
00:05:47,740 --> 00:05:49,541
- Mr. West! Please!
- Coming, little lady.
36
00:05:50,868 --> 00:05:52,536
Hooper .
37
00:05:54,372 --> 00:05:57,583
- Hooper, you can wrap for the day.
- How was the stunt? Okay?
38
00:05:57,750 --> 00:05:59,460
- Yes.
- That good, huh?
39
00:05:59,627 --> 00:06:02,296
- Yeah.
- Would you go so far as to say perfect?
40
00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:05,549
Well, that's what he's supposed
to be, isn't he? Ha-ha-ha.
41
00:06:05,716 --> 00:06:07,009
Tony!
42
00:06:07,176 --> 00:06:09,470
I hate it when directors
slobber all over me.
43
00:06:09,637 --> 00:06:13,975
When your last picture made over $100 million,
you don't have to slobber over anybody.
44
00:06:14,141 --> 00:06:16,560
- You got any Percs?
- Yeah, here.
45
00:06:16,727 --> 00:06:19,230
If you're hurting that bad,
want me to go get the kit?
46
00:06:19,397 --> 00:06:22,525
- No, I'll just chomp on a couple of these.
- What is it this time?
47
00:06:22,692 --> 00:06:23,943
It's my frigging back.
48
00:06:25,569 --> 00:06:28,197
- Are you all right, Sonny?
- Never felt better and had less.
49
00:06:28,364 --> 00:06:30,449
- Listen, you can be replaced.
- Ha, ha.
50
00:06:30,616 --> 00:06:33,416
- The bike gag was terrific.
- Would've killed your ordinary man.
51
00:06:33,536 --> 00:06:37,373
- Mm. Cully, you taking care of my boy?
- Well, I'm trying to, Mr. Berns.
52
00:06:37,540 --> 00:06:40,209
Well, make sure you don't give him
any more of those goddamn pills.
53
00:06:40,376 --> 00:06:41,377
Uh...
54
00:06:41,544 --> 00:06:44,588
By the way, Sonny,
there's a new kid in town.
55
00:06:44,755 --> 00:06:47,049
Everyone says
he's a young Sonny Hooper.
56
00:06:47,216 --> 00:06:49,427
- Would you like to check him out?
- I'm full up.
57
00:06:49,593 --> 00:06:52,054
- You're the boss. See you later.
- Thanks.
58
00:06:52,221 --> 00:06:54,640
- Now, take care.
- See you, Max.
59
00:06:54,807 --> 00:06:58,894
Why is it every time I come to town...
60
00:06:59,061 --> 00:07:01,230
some young boy...
61
00:07:01,397 --> 00:07:03,858
has gotta try
and make a name for himself?
62
00:07:04,025 --> 00:07:07,105
- Do Gregory Peck for the doctor.
- I don't want to see him.
63
00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:09,739
- Gotta go to get some x-rays.
- I've seen my x-rays.
64
00:07:09,905 --> 00:07:13,284
- They look like a map of L.A.
- Maybe you've built another off-ramp.
65
00:07:13,451 --> 00:07:15,327
Wait a minute.
66
00:07:15,494 --> 00:07:19,123
The Percodan is starting to work.
I feel the pain is vanishing.
67
00:07:19,290 --> 00:07:22,877
By God, I think she can dance. I think she can turn.
I think she can whirl.
68
00:07:23,044 --> 00:07:27,048
Whoo! Ooh! Jesus!
How about a date? Ha, ha.
69
00:07:43,606 --> 00:07:44,607
Dancer!
70
00:07:56,410 --> 00:07:58,496
She'll be here in a minute, Dancer.
71
00:07:59,455 --> 00:08:01,207
- Perfect companion.
- Me or Dancer?
72
00:08:01,373 --> 00:08:03,876
I wouldn't kick either one of you
out of the hay.
73
00:08:09,090 --> 00:08:11,258
Hey, you never feed
me a can of beer like that.
74
00:08:11,425 --> 00:08:14,595
- You don't shake it up and down like that.
- Oh, that's very true.
75
00:08:17,473 --> 00:08:21,435
- How'd it go today? Okay? No problems?
- Okay. No.
76
00:08:21,602 --> 00:08:24,230
You fill all those little minds at school
with knowledge?
77
00:08:24,396 --> 00:08:26,065
- I did my very best.
- Ah.
78
00:08:26,232 --> 00:08:29,819
- Cully called. How's your back?
- Oh, yeah? He's got a big mouth.
79
00:08:29,985 --> 00:08:31,487
Oh, come on, how's your back?
80
00:08:31,654 --> 00:08:34,406
A lot better than his
butt's gonna be after I kick it.
81
00:08:34,573 --> 00:08:37,827
What the hell's the matter with Cully,
calling you up all the time?
82
00:08:37,993 --> 00:08:40,329
- Sonny. Your eyes are dilated.
- What?
83
00:08:40,496 --> 00:08:43,332
- Oh, don't start.
- How many pain pills did you take?
84
00:08:43,499 --> 00:08:46,961
I had two, for crying out loud.
I don't take dope. I don't take cocaine.
85
00:08:47,128 --> 00:08:50,297
I don't smoke pot. I take pain pills.
I got pain, for chrissake.
86
00:08:50,464 --> 00:08:52,633
Look at my socks. What are they doing...?
87
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,635
- Those are your socks.
- I know they are.
88
00:08:54,802 --> 00:08:57,763
Why are they on the phone?
My pants are on the chandelier.
89
00:08:57,930 --> 00:09:00,683
- You threw them there last week.
- I was in a horny mood.
90
00:09:00,850 --> 00:09:03,727
It's all over the place.
It's like a beer-can collection.
91
00:09:03,894 --> 00:09:07,565
- It's not a big deal. You don't work that hard.
- I thought of putting it away.
92
00:09:07,731 --> 00:09:11,443
Well, why don't you put it away?
Why don't you take the stuff, put it in...?
93
00:09:11,610 --> 00:09:13,112
Sit down, will you?
94
00:09:17,950 --> 00:09:21,162
- Now, do you want to hear my thinking on this?
- Mm.
95
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:25,583
If I just let things pile up long enough,
we won't be able to find each other.
96
00:09:25,749 --> 00:09:29,295
- Hmm.
- And if you can't find me, you can't have me.
97
00:09:31,088 --> 00:09:32,756
- That makes sense. Ha, ha.
- Yes.
98
00:09:33,340 --> 00:09:35,426
Sonny...
99
00:09:35,593 --> 00:09:38,345
I'm not asking for miracles.
100
00:09:38,512 --> 00:09:42,516
If you could just get the beer cans,
say, 25 feet from...
101
00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:45,561
Ten feet from the trash can. Ten feet.
102
00:09:45,728 --> 00:09:47,021
Hmm.
103
00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:53,694
It's close enough. I'm yours.
104
00:10:00,242 --> 00:10:03,746
- Is your back okay, really?
- It's fine.
105
00:10:03,913 --> 00:10:07,750
- Did you want to walk on it?
- No, I want you to crawl under it.
106
00:10:14,632 --> 00:10:18,093
All right, we're ready down here.
Could we clear the area, please?
107
00:10:18,260 --> 00:10:21,013
- Don't stand in front of the cameras.
- You're a brave doggy.
108
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:23,474
- Right here?
- Put your hand right through there.
109
00:10:23,641 --> 00:10:26,393
- You guys ready on the roof?
- Working on it.
110
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:28,646
- It's tied off? Okay.
- Tied off.
111
00:10:28,812 --> 00:10:31,148
- I love danger.
- Okay, we're ready down here.
112
00:10:31,315 --> 00:10:32,816
Okay, don't look down now.
113
00:10:32,983 --> 00:10:35,945
- Roll the cameras!
- Five, six on all cameras.
114
00:10:36,111 --> 00:10:38,447
- A camera mark.
- B camera mark.
115
00:10:38,614 --> 00:10:40,491
Okay. Action!
116
00:10:41,617 --> 00:10:44,787
Cut, cut! Sensational, Adam!
117
00:10:44,954 --> 00:10:46,747
Rest for a minute.
118
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:48,749
- Good job there, Adam.
- Was I all right?
119
00:10:48,916 --> 00:10:51,335
Help Mr. West down the steps.
120
00:10:51,502 --> 00:10:55,756
All right, now, let's get set up for this stunt.
Let's move it. Move it!
121
00:10:55,923 --> 00:10:57,967
- Good morning.
- Hey, Sonny, how are you?
122
00:10:58,133 --> 00:11:00,678
- Morning, dwarf.
- Clever. You ready?
123
00:11:00,844 --> 00:11:04,265
- Where's "Mr. Movie"? Oh, good morning.
- Right here. Good morning.
124
00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:06,850
Now, as I was telling you
the other day, Hooper...
125
00:11:07,017 --> 00:11:10,020
in this scene you'll be escaping
across the roof with the dog.
126
00:11:10,187 --> 00:11:12,731
The dog? Why do I have a dog?
127
00:11:12,898 --> 00:11:17,194
Just do the stunts like I tell you.
Let me worry about the creativity, okay?
128
00:11:17,361 --> 00:11:20,030
Now, about halfway through,
the sling will break...
129
00:11:20,197 --> 00:11:22,783
and down you will come, dog and all.
130
00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:25,661
And I'll pick up Adam falling
off the awning. It's simple.
131
00:11:25,828 --> 00:11:28,247
If it's so simple,
why don't we have the actor do it?
132
00:11:28,414 --> 00:11:30,833
- I'd like that in one take, Hooper.
- I hope so.
133
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,002
- Okay, people, let's go.
- Just a minute.
134
00:11:33,168 --> 00:11:35,921
Sonny, do you remember me?
135
00:11:36,088 --> 00:11:38,424
- Bidwell from the Humane Society.
- Oh, hi.
136
00:11:38,590 --> 00:11:42,761
- No dog is gonna fall from that.
- No, sir. We have a dummy dog.
137
00:11:42,928 --> 00:11:47,349
The sequence is King riding
with Sonny here, and then we cut...
138
00:11:47,516 --> 00:11:50,144
and substitute the dummy dog
for the actual fall.
139
00:11:50,311 --> 00:11:52,438
I don't know. I don't like the whole setup.
140
00:11:52,604 --> 00:11:55,983
I don't like it either.
I'm the one that's got to do the falling.
141
00:11:56,150 --> 00:11:58,027
But you made that decision for yourself.
142
00:11:58,193 --> 00:12:01,113
- The poor dog can't make that decision.
- Don't worry, sir.
143
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:05,701
The company is very eager to comply
with all Humane Society regulations.
144
00:12:05,868 --> 00:12:09,496
- So we really must be going now.
- Good to see you again, George.
145
00:12:10,122 --> 00:12:13,250
As you can see,
the dummy dog wouldn't fool anybody.
146
00:12:13,417 --> 00:12:16,420
- It wouldn't fool me.
- The realie will take the fall with you.
147
00:12:16,587 --> 00:12:18,964
- Oh, for chrissake.
- There's my man.
148
00:12:19,131 --> 00:12:22,051
- Make me look great, Sonny.
- I'll make you look great, Adam.
149
00:12:22,217 --> 00:12:26,180
You can't use a real dog, Tony, for chrissake.
He can't hit an airbag.
150
00:12:26,347 --> 00:12:28,265
Maybe you can teach him on the way down.
151
00:12:28,432 --> 00:12:30,476
- Do me a favor, will you?
- Yeah, what is it?
152
00:12:30,642 --> 00:12:33,562
- Bring me a stepladder about this high.
- Yeah, what for?
153
00:12:33,729 --> 00:12:36,357
I want you to climb up on
it and kiss my ass. Ha-ha-ha.
154
00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:38,567
See you later, Toulouse!
155
00:12:44,948 --> 00:12:48,786
All right, people,
when Mr. Wonderful gets on his perch...
156
00:12:48,952 --> 00:12:50,496
let's all be ready.
157
00:12:54,291 --> 00:12:57,336
Okay, people, we're ready. Clear it fast.
Get ready on the roof.
158
00:12:57,503 --> 00:13:01,507
- Good man.
- How are you guys today?
159
00:13:01,673 --> 00:13:03,884
- Morning.
- How you doing?
160
00:13:04,051 --> 00:13:05,803
It's all yours.
161
00:13:07,763 --> 00:13:10,391
- Okay, all set there, Sonny?
- Hooper!
162
00:13:10,557 --> 00:13:13,310
People are growing old down here.
163
00:13:13,477 --> 00:13:17,272
One second. You're waiting on me,
you're backing up!
164
00:13:18,857 --> 00:13:20,818
Give me the pooch.
165
00:13:24,279 --> 00:13:27,574
- Okay. Got it?
- Nice doggy. Time for a little ride.
166
00:13:27,741 --> 00:13:29,118
Roll the cameras.
167
00:13:29,284 --> 00:13:32,162
- Mark central camera.
- Make it good, Hooper.
168
00:13:45,509 --> 00:13:46,760
Cut! Print it.
169
00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,637
New setup over here.
170
00:13:48,804 --> 00:13:50,097
Ah.
171
00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:54,518
I'll make you an official stunt dog.
Cully, get this dog a belt buckle.
172
00:13:54,685 --> 00:13:57,104
- Nice going, Sonny.
- You all right?
173
00:13:57,271 --> 00:13:59,398
- Yeah, I'm all right. Yeah.
- Really?
174
00:13:59,565 --> 00:14:00,983
I'm fine.
175
00:14:03,444 --> 00:14:07,030
- You hit like a sack. Are you okay?
- I suppose you thought that was cute.
176
00:14:07,197 --> 00:14:09,324
What happened to the cut?
The dummy dog?
177
00:14:09,491 --> 00:14:13,370
What the hell are you getting on his case for?
He risked his life for that dog.
178
00:14:13,537 --> 00:14:15,038
Use the realie. More realistic.
179
00:14:15,205 --> 00:14:17,207
Do it in one take. Impress the director.
180
00:14:17,374 --> 00:14:19,877
Tony said that's what you were gonna do
and you did it.
181
00:14:20,043 --> 00:14:24,173
Well, we're gonna be pressing formal
charges against you, Sonny. You...
182
00:14:31,597 --> 00:14:33,432
That little runt.
183
00:14:33,599 --> 00:14:35,267
That's one I owe him.
184
00:14:36,727 --> 00:14:38,270
You got your kit?
185
00:14:38,437 --> 00:14:39,897
It's in the trailer.
186
00:14:40,063 --> 00:14:42,524
- Well, let's go to the trailer.
- I knew it.
187
00:14:44,026 --> 00:14:46,906
Do you know what I'd do
if I met the man that invented Xylocaine?
188
00:14:47,029 --> 00:14:48,238
What?
189
00:14:48,405 --> 00:14:51,158
I would kiss his ass
right on Hollywood and Vine.
190
00:14:51,325 --> 00:14:55,329
Ha, ha. I knew you were hurt
the minute you hit that bag.
191
00:14:55,496 --> 00:14:58,123
- But you had to protect the dog.
- I love dogs.
192
00:14:58,290 --> 00:15:00,375
- Let's go to the doctor's.
- I hate doctors.
193
00:15:00,542 --> 00:15:02,336
You ain't scared of nothing.
194
00:15:02,503 --> 00:15:05,088
- Why are you scared of doctors?
- Scared of dentists too.
195
00:15:05,255 --> 00:15:07,174
I'll tell you what you're scared of.
196
00:15:07,341 --> 00:15:10,636
- You're scared of what he's gonna tell you.
- Oh, balls. Balls! Balls!
197
00:15:10,802 --> 00:15:12,721
You're gonna have to see him eventually.
198
00:15:12,888 --> 00:15:15,766
I'll buy the drink
I was gonna buy you last night...
199
00:15:15,933 --> 00:15:18,013
if you'll just do me
your Jimmy Stewart imitation.
200
00:15:18,143 --> 00:15:19,543
Just a little Jimmy Stewart for me.
201
00:15:19,686 --> 00:15:21,847
That's... That's a good deal.
202
00:15:21,980 --> 00:15:25,442
I'll do Jimmy Stewart,
and you do Roy Rogers' sidekick.
203
00:15:25,609 --> 00:15:27,450
- Roy's sidekick.
- Yeah.
204
00:15:27,528 --> 00:15:30,739
Roy is a good old boy, but he...
205
00:15:30,906 --> 00:15:32,658
He had Trigger stuffed, you know?
206
00:15:32,824 --> 00:15:35,619
So when you die,
I'm gonna have you stuffed.
207
00:15:35,786 --> 00:15:36,828
You wouldn't.
208
00:15:36,995 --> 00:15:39,623
I'm gonna stuff everything
but your old wing-dinger.
209
00:15:39,790 --> 00:15:43,627
- That's the part that needs stuffing.
- You ought to stuff that every night.
210
00:15:43,794 --> 00:15:46,296
I'll leave that up to you.
I'm a little too old for it.
211
00:15:46,463 --> 00:15:48,966
- Well, I ain't gonna hold it.
- No. Hell, no.
212
00:15:49,132 --> 00:15:50,801
Banker's hours, eh, Sonny?
213
00:15:50,968 --> 00:15:54,429
- Sonny, it's early for the Palomino, isn't it?
- Not for me, old cock.
214
00:15:54,596 --> 00:15:58,058
- I'll tell you what, that job was perfect.
- Good shot, good shot.
215
00:16:05,816 --> 00:16:08,569
- Hello, Jimbo.
- How you doing, Sonny?
216
00:16:09,945 --> 00:16:13,865
What you doing out here with my lady
when I'm not around? That's dangerous.
217
00:16:14,032 --> 00:16:17,160
- Not as dangerous as doing stunts.
- Yes, it is.
218
00:16:17,869 --> 00:16:19,788
What can I do for you, pard?
219
00:16:19,955 --> 00:16:23,041
I just wanted to make sure
you're doing that charity stunt show.
220
00:16:23,208 --> 00:16:26,295
Oh, I'd love to,
but I'm going on a motocross.
221
00:16:26,461 --> 00:16:28,463
It's for the benefit of the Boys' Home.
222
00:16:28,630 --> 00:16:32,551
That's real touching, but I'm gonna get
on my bike and go across the desert.
223
00:16:32,718 --> 00:16:35,721
I've got somebody who'd really like
to meet you. Idolizes you.
224
00:16:35,887 --> 00:16:39,516
- Knows everything you've ever done.
- Who's that?
225
00:16:39,683 --> 00:16:41,643
One of the boys from the home.
226
00:16:41,810 --> 00:16:43,562
I'll just get him.
227
00:16:44,271 --> 00:16:47,482
- Why didn't he bring violins?
- Honey, it's a boy from the Boys' Home.
228
00:16:47,649 --> 00:16:50,360
They need someone to pattern
their lives after, you know?
229
00:16:50,527 --> 00:16:53,405
- Yeah, what a cheap shot.
- Pete, meet Sonny.
230
00:16:53,572 --> 00:16:55,449
- Hi, Pete.
- Sonny, how you doing?
231
00:16:55,616 --> 00:16:56,896
Real good. How you doing?
232
00:16:57,034 --> 00:16:58,744
- Fine. Guess what.
- What?
233
00:16:58,910 --> 00:17:00,751
- I can do a stunt.
- You can do a stunt?
234
00:17:00,871 --> 00:17:02,873
Let me see it.
235
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:09,004
- Okay, get on there. Shoot him.
- Move it.
236
00:17:09,171 --> 00:17:10,881
- Do what?
- Shoot him.
237
00:17:11,048 --> 00:17:12,257
- Move it.
- Bang.
238
00:17:15,927 --> 00:17:19,139
That's terrific, but I'm going
on the motocross Saturday.
239
00:17:19,681 --> 00:17:24,436
Well, I guess I'll just have to give your gags
to that hot new kid with Stunts Unlimited.
240
00:17:24,603 --> 00:17:28,273
- Oh, yeah? How old are you, kid?
- I'm still dead.
241
00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:29,941
Oh. Right, yeah.
242
00:17:30,108 --> 00:17:32,736
Well, you don't have to be dead anymore.
How old are you?
243
00:17:34,571 --> 00:17:36,406
- I'm 1 s.
- Eight.
244
00:17:36,573 --> 00:17:39,743
- Yeah.
- Okay, I'll be there Saturday.
245
00:17:39,910 --> 00:17:41,828
Great! Ha, ha.
246
00:17:43,455 --> 00:17:45,499
Give me five!
247
00:17:45,666 --> 00:17:48,794
- See you Saturday.
- Thanks, Sonny. You're all heart.
248
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:50,462
Yeah.
249
00:17:52,089 --> 00:17:54,549
Sonny. What a wonderful gesture.
250
00:17:54,716 --> 00:17:57,844
- Ah, I'm a wonderful person.
- Aw.
251
00:17:58,178 --> 00:18:01,598
Welcome to
the 5th Annual Stuntmen 's Benefit Show...
252
00:18:01,765 --> 00:18:04,059
and up the street to your left,
here they come!
253
00:18:04,476 --> 00:18:05,977
Giddyap!
254
00:18:17,447 --> 00:18:20,367
"ANNOUNCER". And pay attention
to the stagecoach driver, Billy Burton...
255
00:18:20,534 --> 00:18:23,245
the best muleskinner in Hollywood.
256
00:18:28,625 --> 00:18:30,460
I see you liked it.
257
00:18:32,546 --> 00:18:33,547
Hey, lady.
258
00:18:33,714 --> 00:18:36,550
- Oh. Hello, Dad.
- Where'd you get all them house apes?
259
00:18:36,717 --> 00:18:39,720
Kids. Where are my kids here?
This is my father.
260
00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:41,471
Hi.
261
00:18:41,638 --> 00:18:43,014
Sonny coming with Dancer?
262
00:18:43,181 --> 00:18:46,727
Yeah. You know why he's here, don't you?
Have you seen that new kid work?
263
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:49,396
Now that son of a bitch knows
how I felt when he came...
264
00:18:49,563 --> 00:18:53,275
- Dad! The language.
- What? Oh. Shit. Sorry. Damn.
265
00:18:54,609 --> 00:18:55,986
Ignore him. He's a degenerate.
266
00:19:11,752 --> 00:19:15,005
"ANNOUNCER". Now, how about a big round
of applause for these two young ladies?
267
00:19:15,172 --> 00:19:18,049
That's all the pay they're gonna get.
268
00:19:18,216 --> 00:19:22,721
Look out, it's Black Bart,
the meanest hombre west of the Pecos.
269
00:19:22,888 --> 00:19:27,350
What we need now is a hero
who can stop him.
270
00:19:27,517 --> 00:19:30,562
- Yee!
- And here he is, just in time!
271
00:19:39,529 --> 00:19:44,826
"ANNOUNCER". That man is one of the true
legends of the stunt world, Mr. Jocko Doyle!
272
00:19:51,833 --> 00:19:55,921
"ANNOUNCER". Here he is, ladies and
gentlemen, the greatest stuntman alive:
273
00:19:56,087 --> 00:19:59,299
Sonny Hooper
and his famous horse, Dancer!
274
00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:01,134
They've never let us down.
275
00:20:01,301 --> 00:20:05,013
They've performed in every benefit
we've ever had.
276
00:20:10,393 --> 00:20:13,647
Whose damn truck is that
parked right in the middle of everything?
277
00:20:13,814 --> 00:20:15,774
That belongs to the kid.
278
00:20:15,941 --> 00:20:18,301
Well, where is this hot kid
I've been hearing so much about?
279
00:20:19,736 --> 00:20:23,698
We better back up a little bit,
or he's gonna drop right on us.
280
00:20:23,865 --> 00:20:25,116
Oh, shit.
281
00:21:14,291 --> 00:21:16,126
Hey, not too shabby.
282
00:21:16,293 --> 00:21:19,629
The chariot race is coming up, kid.
Go put your Fruit of the Looms on.
283
00:21:19,796 --> 00:21:21,798
I'm on my way.
284
00:21:27,304 --> 00:21:30,599
The chariot race is next.
This ought to be a wreck.
285
00:21:30,765 --> 00:21:34,227
- Who's racing against the kid?
- Hammerhead.
286
00:21:35,687 --> 00:21:36,938
Hammerhead?
287
00:21:37,272 --> 00:21:40,358
- How are you, Sonny?
- Hi, Hammerhead.
288
00:21:41,026 --> 00:21:42,611
What's the matter? What...?
289
00:21:42,777 --> 00:21:45,071
What are you looking at?
290
00:21:45,238 --> 00:21:46,907
You've got a nice tush...
291
00:21:47,073 --> 00:21:49,910
but shouldn't you have something on
underneath this thing?
292
00:21:50,076 --> 00:21:52,621
- Like what?
- Like shorts.
293
00:21:52,787 --> 00:21:56,124
This is all they gave me.
And besides, I don't ever wear shorts.
294
00:21:56,291 --> 00:22:00,587
What if you have a wreck?
What if you turn over and it falls out?
295
00:22:01,338 --> 00:22:03,048
It ain't gonna fall out.
296
00:22:03,214 --> 00:22:05,800
Yeah, but what if it does?
What if it falls out?
297
00:22:05,967 --> 00:22:08,511
All the stunt guys
are gonna be embarrassed.
298
00:22:09,346 --> 00:22:13,016
I'll tell you what, you can go to my
trailer, get a pair of my shorts.
299
00:22:13,183 --> 00:22:16,519
You can put them on. I'll watch the
team for you while you're gone.
300
00:22:16,686 --> 00:22:18,813
Hey, thanks, Sonny.
301
00:22:18,980 --> 00:22:22,275
When I get done with the shorts,
I'll have them washed.
302
00:22:27,948 --> 00:22:29,991
Get ready for the chariot race, kids.
303
00:22:30,158 --> 00:22:32,827
Everybody will have to pick your own hero.
304
00:22:33,411 --> 00:22:35,163
Hey, nice fall you did back there.
305
00:22:35,330 --> 00:22:36,873
I'll be. Sonny Hooper.
306
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:40,293
- I've waited a year and a half to meet you.
- Oh, yeah?
307
00:22:41,086 --> 00:22:44,714
- What happened to Hammerhead?
- Oh, he was feeling poorly.
308
00:22:45,423 --> 00:22:47,509
Bad for him, good for me.
309
00:22:48,385 --> 00:22:51,346
- How's that?
- I get to perform with Sonny Hooper.
310
00:22:51,513 --> 00:22:52,913
Oh, hell, that ain't no big deal...
311
00:22:57,560 --> 00:22:59,437
Hyah! Hyah!
312
00:23:00,313 --> 00:23:01,856
Come on, baby!
313
00:23:22,252 --> 00:23:23,628
Come on!
314
00:23:30,468 --> 00:23:31,928
Move it!
315
00:23:40,478 --> 00:23:42,605
Whoa! Whoa!
316
00:24:08,590 --> 00:24:10,258
Wait a minute, Jimbo.
317
00:24:15,638 --> 00:24:18,892
Caca, Dancer. Caca, caca, caca.
318
00:24:25,607 --> 00:24:29,110
- Beautiful, wasn't it? Round and firm...
- Hey, let's go to the Palomino Club.
319
00:24:29,277 --> 00:24:31,821
Had a yellow streak running through them.
320
00:24:31,988 --> 00:24:35,450
- Pretty good trick, Sonny.
- Kid, you know how to make an entrance.
321
00:24:35,617 --> 00:24:38,870
- I'm Jocko Doyle.
- Pleased to meet you, Mr. Doyle.
322
00:24:39,037 --> 00:24:41,581
I've studied just about everything
you've ever done.
323
00:24:41,748 --> 00:24:43,583
Well, that's back in the caveman days.
324
00:24:43,750 --> 00:24:46,795
- You looked good today. Didn't he look good?
- Yeah, he looked good.
325
00:24:46,961 --> 00:24:50,423
- Want to go to the Palomino Club?
- How far did you fall?
326
00:24:50,590 --> 00:24:53,676
- It was about 125 feet.
- What's the furthest I've ever fallen?
327
00:24:53,843 --> 00:24:57,847
- Oh, maybe 150 feet.
- No, I think it was about 85 feet.
328
00:24:58,014 --> 00:25:00,850
Wasn't it more like 75 in Bullet?
329
00:25:01,017 --> 00:25:03,603
Looks like he studied you too.
330
00:25:03,770 --> 00:25:05,563
We'd better go to the Palomino Club.
331
00:25:11,444 --> 00:25:13,613
Go ahead, Jimbo!
332
00:25:26,543 --> 00:25:28,419
I'm really (W!
333
00:25:32,757 --> 00:25:34,217
Hey, it's lonely!
334
00:25:34,384 --> 00:25:37,595
- We're coming over!
- Come on with that cerveza!
335
00:25:44,853 --> 00:25:48,439
Goddamn! That son of a bitch
didn't even say thank you!
336
00:25:48,606 --> 00:25:50,483
Where is that beer?
337
00:26:01,369 --> 00:26:02,745
Hey, Sonny!
338
00:26:02,912 --> 00:26:06,291
- Anybody in there need a beer?
- Jocko needs a beer.
339
00:26:06,457 --> 00:26:11,045
- My arms aren't long enough!
- That's no problem. Wait here.
340
00:26:27,812 --> 00:26:29,772
Pretty fancy!
341
00:26:33,693 --> 00:26:35,945
Let me see your license, please.
342
00:26:46,247 --> 00:26:50,668
- Shall I wait, officer?
- Yeah. No. Do whatever you want!
343
00:27:11,022 --> 00:27:13,399
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
344
00:27:14,317 --> 00:27:17,278
- We're just going backwards.
- Pull that thing over!
345
00:27:17,445 --> 00:27:20,281
- Do what?
- Right over there by the curb.
346
00:27:20,448 --> 00:27:22,033
Okay.
347
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,410
I don't believe I was going over 55.
348
00:27:24,577 --> 00:27:26,996
You were going 55 backwards.
349
00:27:27,163 --> 00:27:30,625
- Well, that's not against the law, is it?
- Unsafe backing.
350
00:27:30,792 --> 00:27:33,962
- Silly law.
- It's still the law.
351
00:27:34,170 --> 00:27:36,798
- Sign here, please.
- All right.
352
00:27:39,926 --> 00:27:41,928
- Here's your license.
- Thank you.
353
00:27:43,388 --> 00:27:45,765
- Here's your ticket.
- See you around.
354
00:27:53,481 --> 00:27:55,024
Have a good trip!
355
00:27:55,191 --> 00:27:58,403
- Happy landings!
- Have a nice day, officer!
356
00:28:26,597 --> 00:28:28,933
Oh, would you move on over, Mama?
357
00:28:29,100 --> 00:28:32,061
Come on and make some room for me.
358
00:28:33,062 --> 00:28:38,401
Jump in the back of my old Pontiac
And I'll drive you to Tennessee.
359
00:28:39,152 --> 00:28:43,990
I'll push the pedal down to the floor
Turn the radio up all the way.
360
00:28:45,283 --> 00:28:50,121
Keep this car in overdrive
And we'll let that rock 'n' roll play.
361
00:28:50,872 --> 00:28:52,540
Go.
362
00:28:58,004 --> 00:29:01,591
Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen.
We appreciate it. Thank you.
363
00:29:01,758 --> 00:29:05,887
We'll be right back. Stick around,
get drunk and be somebody. Thank you.
364
00:29:22,653 --> 00:29:26,157
It's called 75 in a second. And he says,
"Where's that damn dog now?"
365
00:29:26,324 --> 00:29:29,410
He's right alongside. He's:
366
00:29:30,411 --> 00:29:33,790
He said, "Well, shit, I'll just jam it."
And he just floors it!
367
00:29:35,124 --> 00:29:36,918
Will you shut up? I'm trying to tell...
368
00:29:37,085 --> 00:29:40,004
- That table sure is loud over there.
- Making a lot of noise.
369
00:29:40,171 --> 00:29:44,258
Old Blue's right alongside.
And this goddamn truck comes across.
370
00:29:44,425 --> 00:29:48,137
I got 50 cents in the jukebox. I can't hear it.
Let's go get our money's worth.
371
00:29:48,304 --> 00:29:51,933
The old man says, "Well, that's his asshole.
See, he ain't used to them quick stunts."
372
00:29:57,188 --> 00:29:59,065
Say, Granddad.
373
00:29:59,232 --> 00:30:03,986
Hey, Granddad, I got 50 cents in that jukebox,
and all I can hear is your mouth flapping.
374
00:30:04,153 --> 00:30:06,531
What'd you say, son? I'm a mite deaf.
375
00:30:06,697 --> 00:30:09,033
I said, I got 50 cents in that jukebox...
376
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:12,412
and all I can hear is your mouth flapping.
Did you hear that?
377
00:30:12,578 --> 00:30:15,998
- Now, we figure you owe us 50 cents.
- You guys from out of town?
378
00:30:16,165 --> 00:30:18,751
- Uh-huh. Houston.
- Oh, yeah? What are you doing here?
379
00:30:18,918 --> 00:30:22,463
- A convention.
- Convention? What kind of convention?
380
00:30:22,630 --> 00:30:23,631
Convention of assholes?
381
00:30:26,926 --> 00:30:29,971
- Ha-ha-ha. Thank you.
- A SWAT convention.
382
00:30:30,138 --> 00:30:31,264
Oh.
383
00:30:31,431 --> 00:30:32,723
A SWAT convention.
384
00:30:32,890 --> 00:30:36,144
A SWAT team?
They gonna swat flies? Ha-ha-ha.
385
00:30:36,310 --> 00:30:38,151
You know how to save a policeman
from drowning?
386
00:30:38,312 --> 00:30:39,313
- No.
- Good!
387
00:30:42,233 --> 00:30:43,985
What about my 50 cents?
388
00:30:44,152 --> 00:30:45,236
Uh...
389
00:30:45,403 --> 00:30:46,446
Um...
390
00:30:46,612 --> 00:30:47,947
Yeah.
391
00:30:48,114 --> 00:30:50,658
- Can I borrow your hard hat?
- Sure.
392
00:30:53,661 --> 00:30:57,331
I'll get you your 50 cents. Excuse me.
393
00:30:59,459 --> 00:31:02,462
Looks like a job for the Golden Helmet.
394
00:31:25,318 --> 00:31:29,113
Well, if you wanted to make somebody
look like an asshole, boy, you sure did.
395
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:30,990
That was you.
396
00:31:33,201 --> 00:31:38,039
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven,
eight, nine, 10, 11, 12.
397
00:31:39,457 --> 00:31:40,833
Six against 12.
398
00:31:42,001 --> 00:31:43,794
Seven.
399
00:31:45,296 --> 00:31:46,756
Seven against 12.
400
00:31:46,923 --> 00:31:48,508
Well...
401
00:31:48,674 --> 00:31:50,718
looks like it's a little uneven.
402
00:31:50,885 --> 00:31:53,405
You guys will have to go back to Houston
and get some more guys.
403
00:32:15,159 --> 00:32:17,245
We may be in trouble.
404
00:32:23,876 --> 00:32:26,170
We are definitely in trouble.
405
00:32:39,976 --> 00:32:42,645
Holy shit! A fight!
406
00:32:43,437 --> 00:32:45,231
What's that?
407
00:32:45,856 --> 00:32:47,692
Wait, wait, wait.
408
00:32:58,911 --> 00:33:01,080
Give me a hand, will you?
409
00:33:01,247 --> 00:33:03,332
Cute. Really cute.
410
00:33:04,750 --> 00:33:06,586
Oh, how rude!
411
00:33:07,211 --> 00:33:09,088
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
412
00:33:11,632 --> 00:33:14,093
Look out now! Oh!
413
00:33:14,844 --> 00:33:17,346
We're getting a little old for this shit,
ain't we?
414
00:33:17,513 --> 00:33:19,932
That's right. Let's go
get some sexy... Ooh!
415
00:33:35,865 --> 00:33:39,410
Listen, fudge nuts, you ain't
ever gonna learn, are you, dummy?
416
00:33:39,577 --> 00:33:43,122
Willard! Jeffrey! Get this son of a bitch!
417
00:33:52,048 --> 00:33:53,049
Ow.
418
00:33:53,215 --> 00:33:57,803
It's a bird! It's a plane!
It's Super Hooper!
419
00:34:23,454 --> 00:34:25,956
Oh, well. Another night, no profits.
420
00:34:26,123 --> 00:34:28,542
Huell! Get out there and stop that.
421
00:34:28,709 --> 00:34:30,628
- Yes, ma'am. You bet.
- Get them, Huell!
422
00:34:34,882 --> 00:34:37,802
Bouncers! Throw them out.
423
00:34:52,316 --> 00:34:55,778
God dang! Isn't that fun? Ha-ha-ha. Whoo!
424
00:34:55,945 --> 00:34:57,780
- Let's go back in!
- Are you crazy?
425
00:34:57,947 --> 00:35:01,492
- Let's just talk about it a minute.
- Oh, what are you talking about?
426
00:35:08,124 --> 00:35:10,960
You were really
graceful in there tonight, kid.
427
00:35:11,127 --> 00:35:13,129
Where'd you learn to fight like that?
428
00:35:13,295 --> 00:35:15,798
- Hahaha.
- I was on the Olympic boxing team.
429
00:35:15,965 --> 00:35:18,426
I'll show you how to throw
a man out of here!
430
00:35:18,592 --> 00:35:21,220
I've been getting thrown
out of here since... Aah!
431
00:35:21,387 --> 00:35:23,431
Before you were goddamn born!
432
00:35:23,597 --> 00:35:25,808
All right, all right.
433
00:35:26,642 --> 00:35:29,478
These fights ain't worth a shit anymore.
434
00:35:29,645 --> 00:35:31,605
Kid, what's your name?
435
00:35:32,773 --> 00:35:34,859
Delmore Shidski.
436
00:35:35,025 --> 00:35:37,445
- What's that last name again?
- Shidski.
437
00:35:37,611 --> 00:35:41,532
- How do you spell that?
- Are you kidding me?
438
00:35:41,699 --> 00:35:44,326
- Huh? S-H-I-D...
- S-K-I.
439
00:35:44,493 --> 00:35:46,036
Well, we'll just call him Ski.
440
00:35:46,203 --> 00:35:50,332
Hey, the night's too quiet
and it's too young to quit!
441
00:35:53,294 --> 00:35:55,671
It is too damn mean in there.
442
00:35:55,838 --> 00:35:59,175
Let's go someplace else.
Let's go get some loving.
443
00:35:59,341 --> 00:36:02,011
- Thanks a lot, Tim. All right.
- Catch you next time.
444
00:36:02,178 --> 00:36:04,138
Shit. That wasn't any kind of fight.
445
00:36:04,305 --> 00:36:07,141
Let's go on up to the ranch
and show them your stunt reels.
446
00:36:07,308 --> 00:36:08,726
Hey, pretty!
447
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:12,229
- Yeah. Would you like to see it?
- Yeah, I would.
448
00:36:12,396 --> 00:36:15,232
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
Wait a minute!
449
00:36:18,611 --> 00:36:21,113
Wait a minute! It's 1:30 in the morning!
450
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:24,575
You whip up some eggs for the guys
and we'll have a little party.
451
00:36:24,742 --> 00:36:27,787
We'll just drink. What the hell.
We're gonna have a party at my house.
452
00:37:24,093 --> 00:37:25,803
It always leaves them speechless.
453
00:37:28,806 --> 00:37:30,766
- That was great, Sonny.
- Thank you.
454
00:37:30,933 --> 00:37:33,269
Looks like you've done
every gag there ever was.
455
00:37:33,435 --> 00:37:35,521
Well...
456
00:37:35,688 --> 00:37:39,275
- ...me and Jocko-
- Yeah! Believe I will.
457
00:37:40,651 --> 00:37:44,488
Me and Jocko, we...
We never turned down a stunt.
458
00:37:44,655 --> 00:37:46,198
No.
459
00:37:46,740 --> 00:37:48,659
Never turned down a gag.
460
00:37:49,577 --> 00:37:51,787
I had it in my will once...
461
00:37:53,122 --> 00:37:56,250
- ...l thought I was gonna, uh...
- Die.
462
00:37:56,417 --> 00:38:00,671
I'd have something to leave,
and I put it in the will. I said...
463
00:38:00,838 --> 00:38:03,382
I wanted it on the cement, on the thing...
464
00:38:03,549 --> 00:38:05,426
- Tombstone.
- Tombstone!
465
00:38:05,593 --> 00:38:08,345
"Jocko Doyle never turned down a gag."
See?
466
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:11,560
- Perfect.
- That was... Been a hell of an idea.
467
00:38:11,599 --> 00:38:12,892
Perfect, perfect, perfect.
468
00:38:14,602 --> 00:38:16,478
Once I turned down...
469
00:38:16,645 --> 00:38:19,023
What I did turn down was everything else...
470
00:38:19,189 --> 00:38:23,485
but then, shit,
gotta keep the good times rolling.
471
00:38:26,238 --> 00:38:28,949
Is that why you did it all?
Because of the good times?
472
00:38:29,116 --> 00:38:32,828
Well, you don't wanna knock
good times, kid. I mean...
473
00:38:32,995 --> 00:38:35,372
I get so damn old, I'm just...
474
00:38:35,539 --> 00:38:39,543
sitting in my rocking chair on a porch,
I wanna have same nice memories.
475
00:38:39,710 --> 00:38:42,338
What the hell else is there?
476
00:38:42,504 --> 00:38:44,882
I don't know, just, uh...
477
00:38:45,049 --> 00:38:47,801
Maybe prove certain things
can be done or that...
478
00:38:47,968 --> 00:38:50,179
a man can do just about anything
he puts his mind to.
479
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:54,516
That is too deep for me.
480
00:38:54,683 --> 00:38:59,229
Sun! The sun's come up! It's daylight!
481
00:39:17,206 --> 00:39:19,458
- Hey.
- Mm.
482
00:39:19,625 --> 00:39:23,045
You ought to drink more.
Nothing hurts when you're numb.
483
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:28,092
Hmm.
484
00:39:28,258 --> 00:39:32,221
- Where's the kid?
- He's standing in there...
485
00:39:32,388 --> 00:39:36,016
staring avariciously
into your trophy case...
486
00:39:36,183 --> 00:39:38,560
little trickles of slobber
running down here.
487
00:39:43,941 --> 00:39:48,278
It's so goddamn funny. You weren't
a hell of a lot different a few years ago.
488
00:39:48,445 --> 00:39:50,197
- Twenty years ago.
- Twenty years ago.
489
00:39:52,241 --> 00:39:55,035
Your little eyes were spinning around,
beady“.
490
00:39:55,202 --> 00:39:57,121
Looking for fame and fortune.
491
00:39:57,287 --> 00:39:59,665
- Shit.
- Ha-ha-ha.
492
00:40:00,708 --> 00:40:05,713
And I know damn well too. I was sitting
there making $20,000 a year...
493
00:40:05,879 --> 00:40:08,465
as the top dog around this place.
494
00:40:08,632 --> 00:40:12,177
Every time I look over my shoulder,
there you are jumping up and down...
495
00:40:12,344 --> 00:40:15,764
figuring out some way
you can top whatever gag I did.
496
00:40:15,931 --> 00:40:18,517
- Well?
- Well?
497
00:40:18,684 --> 00:40:20,045
Well, you gonna marry my daughter?
498
00:40:20,185 --> 00:40:26,608
Oh. Goddamn, Jocko. I was married once.
You know that. It was a disaster. I...
499
00:40:26,775 --> 00:40:31,655
I felt like a failure, you know?
I'm scared to death of marriage.
500
00:40:31,822 --> 00:40:35,367
Besides that,
nobody's getting married today anyway.
501
00:40:35,534 --> 00:40:38,287
- Who ain't getting married?
- Nobody's getting married!
502
00:40:38,454 --> 00:40:41,874
Name me somebody that ain't getting married.
Name me two people.
503
00:40:42,041 --> 00:40:43,709
Everybody's... People getting...
504
00:40:43,876 --> 00:40:46,117
- Faggots are getting married, for chrissake.
- Ha-ha-ha.
505
00:40:46,211 --> 00:40:48,922
What the hell do you mean,
nobody's getting married? Eh.
506
00:40:49,506 --> 00:40:51,300
I love her, Jocko...
507
00:40:51,467 --> 00:40:53,719
but I gotta do things in my own time.
508
00:40:53,886 --> 00:40:56,847
- You're a horny son of a bitch.
- I gotta do things my own way.
509
00:40:57,014 --> 00:40:59,099
Yeah, well, that's what I done, see?
510
00:40:59,266 --> 00:41:03,771
In my time, my way.
I wasn't even home when she was born.
511
00:41:05,314 --> 00:41:06,690
Listen, you.
512
00:41:07,775 --> 00:41:10,194
Didn't you ever want that?
513
00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:16,825
Haven't you ever been with Gwen
when you wanted to have a baby? Huh?
514
00:41:17,242 --> 00:41:20,162
Did you ever have that feeling?
515
00:41:20,329 --> 00:41:22,122
All the time, Jocko.
516
00:41:23,207 --> 00:41:24,958
All the time.
517
00:41:25,292 --> 00:41:27,127
Listen, Roger, we gotta have a talk.
518
00:41:27,294 --> 00:41:29,338
The studio's bugging me about the budget.
519
00:41:29,505 --> 00:41:30,506
Later, Max.
520
00:41:30,672 --> 00:41:35,052
I've got to get this first shot.
Tony, let's set up this first one, okay?
521
00:41:35,219 --> 00:41:36,470
Listen, Roger.
522
00:41:37,763 --> 00:41:39,348
Medic!
523
00:41:39,515 --> 00:41:41,391
Oh. Thank you, my love.
524
00:41:45,270 --> 00:41:46,480
Ah! Thank you.
525
00:41:46,647 --> 00:41:48,315
- Good morning, Mr. Berns.
- Hi, Max.
526
00:41:48,482 --> 00:41:51,235
- Why, that punk. Who? Roger.
- Who?
527
00:41:51,401 --> 00:41:54,446
If his last picture hadn't grossed
$100 million, I'd kick his ass.
528
00:41:54,613 --> 00:41:57,449
Do it! We've been waiting for months
for you to kick his ass.
529
00:41:57,616 --> 00:41:59,159
You guys look like garbage.
530
00:41:59,326 --> 00:42:01,870
You should see through my eyes.
It's Metrocolor.
531
00:42:02,037 --> 00:42:05,165
I've just got a little headache.
You think we're bad, you should see...!
532
00:42:05,332 --> 00:42:06,732
Don't yell in my ear. Jesus Christ!
533
00:42:08,335 --> 00:42:09,336
What the hell is that?
534
00:42:10,838 --> 00:42:12,965
Look what's coming.
535
00:42:13,715 --> 00:42:17,094
Stop that thing! Shoot it! Kill it!
536
00:42:17,261 --> 00:42:20,347
- Want some breakfast?
- Oh! God. Get that circumcised, will you?
537
00:42:20,514 --> 00:42:24,143
- What are you doing here? What?
- Reporting for work.
538
00:42:24,309 --> 00:42:26,603
- Reporting for work.
- To work?
539
00:42:26,770 --> 00:42:29,022
Yeah. You told me last night
to come to work.
540
00:42:29,189 --> 00:42:31,692
- Did I do that?
- I don't remember that.
541
00:42:31,859 --> 00:42:34,695
- Oh.
- You were pretty bombed. Want me to leave?
542
00:42:34,862 --> 00:42:38,490
No. No, I don't want you to leave.
We'll find you some work.
543
00:42:38,657 --> 00:42:40,617
All right, everybody's ready now.
544
00:42:40,784 --> 00:42:42,911
- Roll the cameras.
- Cameras ready.
545
00:42:43,078 --> 00:42:45,455
- Marking able.
- And maker.
546
00:42:45,622 --> 00:42:46,957
All right, background! Action!
547
00:42:57,176 --> 00:42:58,802
Cut it! Cut it!
548
00:43:05,684 --> 00:43:06,935
Okay?
549
00:43:07,102 --> 00:43:09,229
Didn't do a thing for me, Hooper.
550
00:43:09,396 --> 00:43:10,981
Missed by a mile.
551
00:43:11,148 --> 00:43:13,275
Boring, boring, boring.
552
00:43:13,442 --> 00:43:16,945
I'm not a mind reader, Roger.
If you tell me what you want, I'll do it.
553
00:43:17,112 --> 00:43:19,781
Look, you're the stunt gaffer, so gaff.
554
00:43:19,948 --> 00:43:22,826
I've got an idea.
Would take some time, though.
555
00:43:22,993 --> 00:43:26,622
- Who are you?
- He's a new man. Ski. He's a good man.
556
00:43:26,788 --> 00:43:29,208
Anything will be better than that,
so let's try one.
557
00:43:29,541 --> 00:43:33,545
Thanks to the kid here, the Polack, we have
to sit around waiting for night to shoot.
558
00:43:35,839 --> 00:43:38,091
Gives me time to get over my hangover.
559
00:43:38,258 --> 00:43:39,843
Guys, it's Roger's birthday.
560
00:43:40,010 --> 00:43:41,970
Oh.
561
00:43:42,804 --> 00:43:45,807
I thought maybe we could all think
of something to give him?
562
00:43:45,974 --> 00:43:47,017
How about VD?
563
00:43:48,602 --> 00:43:52,773
Oh, I got an idea. I know something perfect
for him. Everybody cough up a little money.
564
00:43:52,940 --> 00:43:55,567
Happy birthday, Roger.
565
00:43:55,734 --> 00:43:59,029
Watch your feet, guys.
566
00:43:59,196 --> 00:44:03,867
Well, what more can I say?
I'm very, very touched, and thank you.
567
00:44:11,708 --> 00:44:15,420
This fire scene is very dangerous.
We want everybody on their toes.
568
00:44:15,587 --> 00:44:17,506
We don't want anybody hurt.
569
00:44:17,673 --> 00:44:19,216
Okay, action!
570
00:44:19,383 --> 00:44:22,052
- Remember, that's gasoline in there, Sonny.
- Right.
571
00:44:22,219 --> 00:44:24,763
- Be careful.
- Bless your cock.
572
00:44:50,205 --> 00:44:51,206
Aah!
573
00:44:51,373 --> 00:44:52,666
Hello, gorgeous.
574
00:44:52,833 --> 00:44:56,628
- Sonny, will you get me out of here?
- You bet your sweet bippy.
575
00:44:57,754 --> 00:45:00,007
- Sonny, will you get serious!
- No time for that.
576
00:45:02,926 --> 00:45:06,221
Are they okay? I can't
see through the flame.
577
00:45:09,891 --> 00:45:11,268
Cut it! Cut it!
578
00:45:11,435 --> 00:45:14,354
Are you guys waiting for an invitation
to put that fire out?
579
00:45:14,521 --> 00:45:15,605
L.A.'s got enough smog.
580
00:45:15,772 --> 00:45:17,399
Oh.
581
00:45:17,607 --> 00:45:20,652
You know, Sonny, I love stuntmen.
582
00:45:20,819 --> 00:45:24,906
Let's get that fire out.
I want everybody to stay back here.
583
00:45:25,073 --> 00:45:28,076
- Don't get near those flames.
- Tony.
584
00:45:28,243 --> 00:45:30,662
Get Hooper over here for me, will you?
585
00:45:43,967 --> 00:45:46,678
Uh, Hooper,
that bit at the complex tomorrow...
586
00:45:46,845 --> 00:45:49,306
- who's set for it?
- Bobby Bass.
587
00:45:49,473 --> 00:45:52,768
Hmm. Would you mind if Ski did it instead?
588
00:45:53,685 --> 00:45:55,520
Yes, I would mind, Roger. Uh...
589
00:45:55,687 --> 00:45:57,898
I'm the stunt coordinator
on this picture...
590
00:45:58,065 --> 00:46:00,442
and I say who does
and who doesn't do the stunts.
591
00:46:00,609 --> 00:46:02,319
And I'd like Bobby Bass.
592
00:46:02,694 --> 00:46:06,573
Hmm. Well, I don't want to infringe
on your authority...
593
00:46:06,740 --> 00:46:11,411
but I really would like Ski
to do that gag, okay?
594
00:46:22,964 --> 00:46:24,257
Six-three, Louis.
595
00:46:24,424 --> 00:46:27,594
Okay, everybody,
we're ready to make one. Roll the cameras!
596
00:46:27,761 --> 00:46:29,471
Speed! A camera.
597
00:46:30,680 --> 00:46:32,557
Baker!
598
00:46:34,518 --> 00:46:36,061
Action!
599
00:46:45,570 --> 00:46:48,323
Cut it!
Bring the stuntman out here, please.
600
00:46:49,950 --> 00:46:52,369
Great, Kent! Go downstairs, relax.
Wonderful.
601
00:46:52,911 --> 00:46:54,871
Hey, good luck, Ski.
602
00:46:55,038 --> 00:46:58,583
All right, you gotta make him look good.
Okay? All the preparation you need.
603
00:46:58,750 --> 00:47:01,670
- We'll go down and set up the cameras.
- You got it.
604
00:47:03,505 --> 00:47:08,009
All right, people, we're in the wrong place.
Now move it all downstairs.
605
00:47:08,176 --> 00:47:10,137
Let's go! Let's move it!
606
00:47:12,514 --> 00:47:14,683
You ready, Ski?
607
00:47:14,850 --> 00:47:16,768
He'll be ready in a second.
608
00:47:22,732 --> 00:47:24,526
Tony, he's ready!
609
00:47:24,693 --> 00:47:26,194
- Roll the cameras!
- Speed!
610
00:47:26,361 --> 00:47:28,196
B camera marker.
611
00:47:28,780 --> 00:47:30,699
Come on, good buddy.
612
00:47:40,709 --> 00:47:42,836
Not too shabby.
613
00:47:43,003 --> 00:47:44,838
No, that's pretty good.
614
00:47:45,505 --> 00:47:47,799
We could've done
that when we were his age...
615
00:47:47,966 --> 00:47:50,510
except they didn't have
buildings that tall. Ha-ha-ha.
616
00:48:11,239 --> 00:48:13,158
Cut it! Cut it!
617
00:48:16,745 --> 00:48:19,122
You have to admit he's pretty damn good.
618
00:48:19,289 --> 00:48:21,791
- Yeah, I have to admit it.
- Pretty damn young too.
619
00:48:21,958 --> 00:48:24,252
Yeah, I hate him. I just hate him.
620
00:48:25,879 --> 00:48:27,506
- Handsome little shit.
- Ugh.
621
00:48:28,173 --> 00:48:29,841
Well?
622
00:48:31,676 --> 00:48:33,553
I thought it was a little slow.
623
00:48:33,720 --> 00:48:38,183
If you don't mind, uh,
I'd like to have another one. Okay?
624
00:48:38,850 --> 00:48:40,227
Are you kidding me?
625
00:48:40,769 --> 00:48:42,103
Yeah, I'm kidding.
626
00:48:44,439 --> 00:48:47,067
Come around tomorrow.
I'll show you how an old man does it.
627
00:49:43,248 --> 00:49:45,750
- Here you go, Sonny.
- Thanks, Don.
628
00:49:59,180 --> 00:50:00,974
We're all ready, Hooper.
629
00:50:01,141 --> 00:50:04,561
A little air in the air bag would help,
numb-nuts.
630
00:50:05,812 --> 00:50:07,355
Get that filled up!
631
00:50:07,522 --> 00:50:08,940
Sonny!
632
00:50:09,482 --> 00:50:11,526
- Are you crazy? Huh?
- What?
633
00:50:11,693 --> 00:50:14,654
- I just talked to that helicopter pilot.
- So?
634
00:50:14,821 --> 00:50:16,823
Well, how high are you gonna drop?
635
00:50:16,990 --> 00:50:19,951
- What's the world record?
- Two twenty-three.
636
00:50:20,118 --> 00:50:22,037
I'll go 224.
637
00:50:43,516 --> 00:50:44,768
Roll the cameras!
638
00:50:44,934 --> 00:50:46,436
Action!
639
00:51:04,204 --> 00:51:05,765
Pull me in, Jeffrey! Pull me in!
640
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,460
Whoa.
641
00:51:12,629 --> 00:51:16,091
I hope nothing happens to this dinner jacket.
Man, I want to keep this.
642
00:51:16,257 --> 00:51:19,052
- Whoo! You look like a head waiter.
- I am.
643
00:52:02,721 --> 00:52:03,972
Geronimo!
644
00:52:32,375 --> 00:52:34,878
You've got another world record
for your books, buddy.
645
00:52:35,044 --> 00:52:37,088
How about a can of Coors? Huh?
646
00:52:37,255 --> 00:52:39,466
Sonny, you can jump
on my mattress any time.
647
00:52:39,632 --> 00:52:41,426
- Fantastic.
- You're great, Sonny.
648
00:52:41,593 --> 00:52:43,511
- Terrific, Sonny.
- Hooper, it was nice.
649
00:52:43,678 --> 00:52:45,930
- You're through for the day.
- I'm proud of you.
650
00:52:46,097 --> 00:52:48,850
I bet that air bag didn't look that...
651
00:52:49,017 --> 00:52:53,188
Without causing any commotion,
I want to go see the doctor.
652
00:52:53,521 --> 00:52:55,322
About the same thing. Another tropism.
653
00:52:55,482 --> 00:52:58,318
We've got a coronal-facing here
and another sagittal-facing here...
654
00:52:58,485 --> 00:53:00,653
two areas of instability...
655
00:53:00,820 --> 00:53:03,865
within the space of around two
or three lumbar vertebrae.
656
00:53:04,032 --> 00:53:07,619
Now, if we go over here, as you can see,
this is the articulating facet.
657
00:53:07,786 --> 00:53:11,748
This is a coronal-facing here,
and this is a sagittal-facing over here.
658
00:53:11,915 --> 00:53:14,751
This gives a very unstable
low-back condition.
659
00:53:14,918 --> 00:53:16,503
How's my cockus erectus?
660
00:53:16,669 --> 00:53:19,547
- If you'll hold on to it for a minute, I'll finish.
- Fine.
661
00:53:19,714 --> 00:53:25,512
All of these conditions make it look like
you're having a preosteoporotic condition.
662
00:53:27,680 --> 00:53:31,017
- Frankly, Sonny, it doesn't look too promising.
- Ha-ha-ha.
663
00:53:31,184 --> 00:53:35,563
Hell, I thought I had a problem till you
explained it. Now I'm not worried anymore.
664
00:53:35,730 --> 00:53:38,191
- Christ, I was really proud of that operation.
- Mm.
665
00:53:38,358 --> 00:53:40,985
The average person,
it would have lasted them for a lifetime.
666
00:53:41,152 --> 00:53:43,029
- Hmm.
- But not with you.
667
00:53:43,196 --> 00:53:45,076
Why do you keep on screwing up
all my good work?
668
00:53:45,198 --> 00:53:47,325
Ha, ha. You should be paying me.
669
00:53:47,492 --> 00:53:50,703
Half of what you know you learned
from wiring me together.
670
00:53:50,870 --> 00:53:52,622
What have you got, a death wish?
671
00:53:52,789 --> 00:53:55,750
Look who's talking.
These things are nails in your coffin.
672
00:53:55,917 --> 00:53:57,585
- Jesus.
- I'm cutting way down.
673
00:53:57,752 --> 00:53:59,796
Ha-ha-ha. I hope so.
674
00:53:59,963 --> 00:54:01,798
- Look, Sonny, I'm serious.
- Good.
675
00:54:01,965 --> 00:54:04,425
You can't keep bashing your backbone...
676
00:54:04,592 --> 00:54:07,345
and expect to go walking around
like a normal person.
677
00:54:07,512 --> 00:54:10,723
Listen, I can handle it. I'm a tough guy.
You know what I mean?
678
00:54:10,890 --> 00:54:13,810
Give it to me, sweetheart.
Don't pull any punches.
679
00:54:14,435 --> 00:54:16,145
The kid can take it.
680
00:54:16,312 --> 00:54:19,566
The kid could take it.
Only you're not a kid any longer.
681
00:54:19,732 --> 00:54:23,152
- Look, heh, I'm gonna level with you.
- Hmm?
682
00:54:23,319 --> 00:54:25,405
- One good impact here...
- Ow.
683
00:54:25,572 --> 00:54:27,490
You understand?
You're gonna be paralyzed.
684
00:54:27,657 --> 00:54:30,451
From the neck down, nothing moves.
685
00:54:32,245 --> 00:54:35,123
- Nothing?
- Heh. Yeah, even your ding-dong.
686
00:54:35,290 --> 00:54:37,417
- My ding-dong.
- Heh.
687
00:54:37,584 --> 00:54:40,670
Look, Sonny, I'm not saying it'll happen,
but you could die.
688
00:54:40,837 --> 00:54:43,965
Well, if my ding-dong ain't gonna work,
I don't wanna live.
689
00:54:44,132 --> 00:54:46,301
All right. But the odds are against you.
690
00:54:46,467 --> 00:54:50,054
If you were a horse, I'd shoot you.
691
00:54:53,600 --> 00:54:55,643
I bet a big five.
692
00:54:57,103 --> 00:54:58,646
- "El foldo."
- El foldo.
693
00:54:58,813 --> 00:55:01,024
Star, el foldo. El foldo.
694
00:55:01,190 --> 00:55:03,401
I'll see it. And here come the biggies.
695
00:55:03,943 --> 00:55:05,194
Screw the biggies.
696
00:55:05,361 --> 00:55:08,197
Wait a minute. You can't use that thing.
What is that?
697
00:55:08,364 --> 00:55:11,743
- It's my pocket computer.
- You can't use a computer. You can't use that.
698
00:55:11,910 --> 00:55:15,079
Show me where it says I can't,
and I'll put it up.
699
00:55:15,413 --> 00:55:18,875
- Hmm.
- All right. I'll see your five and I'll raise you five.
700
00:55:19,042 --> 00:55:22,545
Uh, I'll just use
my manually operated poker sense...
701
00:55:22,712 --> 00:55:24,964
against your mechanical wizardry.
702
00:55:25,131 --> 00:55:27,717
And I'll bump you a quarter.
703
00:55:27,884 --> 00:55:29,510
- High roller, huh?
- Mm-hm.
704
00:55:29,677 --> 00:55:31,137
Look at that, gang.
705
00:55:32,722 --> 00:55:34,223
Who is that guy?
706
00:55:34,390 --> 00:55:37,268
- That's the writer. Heh.
- Well, he looks a little miffed.
707
00:55:51,824 --> 00:55:55,620
- You think Roger didn't like his script?
- I think so. Ha-ha-ha.
708
00:55:55,787 --> 00:55:57,288
- What do you got?
- Pair of fours.
709
00:55:57,455 --> 00:55:59,666
- Pair of sevens.
- Ha-ha-ha.
710
00:56:00,375 --> 00:56:02,710
Sevens. Three aces. Ha-ha-ha.
711
00:56:02,877 --> 00:56:05,630
- It was a calculated risk.
- So was the Edsel. Ha-ha-ha.
712
00:56:05,797 --> 00:56:09,926
- Like to sit in for a hand, Mr. Berns?
- Thanks, Cully, but I'm not in the mood.
713
00:56:10,093 --> 00:56:13,054
- Well, you characters, you did it this time.
- How's that?
714
00:56:13,221 --> 00:56:17,016
Roger. You got him so excited
he's rewriting the script...
715
00:56:17,183 --> 00:56:19,435
putting a whole bunch
of new gags in for you.
716
00:56:19,602 --> 00:56:21,962
- What, he want us to blow up L.A.?
- Ha, ha.
717
00:56:22,105 --> 00:56:24,857
No joke. The writer was a little upset,
as you may have noticed.
718
00:56:25,024 --> 00:56:26,818
Yeah, we noticed.
719
00:56:26,985 --> 00:56:30,697
And the studio is backing him all the way.
They say it's his ball game.
720
00:56:30,863 --> 00:56:34,534
So tomorrow morning at 8:00, on Stage 6...
721
00:56:34,701 --> 00:56:39,288
he's having a meeting with you fellas,
and he's gonna show you a new ending.
722
00:56:39,455 --> 00:56:41,374
The biggest earthquake ever.
723
00:56:41,541 --> 00:56:43,835
You guys are trying to drive to safety.
724
00:56:44,002 --> 00:56:47,588
The first thing we'll do is collapse
this building into a giant crevice.
725
00:56:47,755 --> 00:56:49,132
Giant crevice.
726
00:56:49,298 --> 00:56:52,552
You're driving through explosions,
bodies flying everywhere, fire...
727
00:56:52,719 --> 00:56:56,973
You're just about to reach safety when barn!
We blow the bridge.
728
00:56:57,140 --> 00:56:59,767
And you fellas will have to rappel down
into the gorge...
729
00:56:59,934 --> 00:57:01,936
There'll be a lot of fire and smoke
and explosions.
730
00:57:02,103 --> 00:57:03,855
Up the other side to safety.
731
00:57:04,022 --> 00:57:06,357
- All in one shot?
- All in one shot.
732
00:57:06,524 --> 00:57:09,318
Flames, explosions, death. Everything.
733
00:57:09,485 --> 00:57:12,780
And you guys leaping out of it to triumph.
Isn't it a great idea?
734
00:57:12,947 --> 00:57:14,824
It's a great idea, Roger.
735
00:57:14,991 --> 00:57:16,868
I can't imagine anything better.
736
00:57:17,035 --> 00:57:18,536
Why not jump a car over the gorge?
737
00:57:18,703 --> 00:57:21,497
Aw, Ski, will you knock
it off with the jokes?
738
00:57:21,664 --> 00:57:23,875
No, no, no. What do you mean, Ski?
739
00:57:24,042 --> 00:57:27,587
Well, you'd have the biggest,
best car stunt ever done.
740
00:57:32,175 --> 00:57:35,219
What kind of car
could leap a gorge that wide?
741
00:57:35,386 --> 00:57:38,306
- A rocket car could make it.
- Well, I don't like it.
742
00:57:38,473 --> 00:57:40,349
What if you don't make it'?
743
00:57:40,516 --> 00:57:42,935
- Cliff?
- They could make it, couldn't they?
744
00:57:43,102 --> 00:57:45,354
Sure, they could make it!
745
00:57:46,022 --> 00:57:47,273
Cliff...
746
00:57:47,440 --> 00:57:50,026
what's the longest jump
a rocket car's ever made'?
747
00:57:50,193 --> 00:57:52,612
Buddy Joe took one 187 feet once.
748
00:57:52,779 --> 00:57:56,240
- How far is this?
- Three hundred and twenty-five feet.
749
00:57:56,407 --> 00:57:58,826
Could you beef up the suspension?
750
00:57:58,993 --> 00:58:03,998
Build a cage strong enough to protect Ski
and I when we landed on the other side?
751
00:58:04,165 --> 00:58:07,293
I could build a car like that,
but I can't tell how it would land.
752
00:58:07,460 --> 00:58:11,464
- That's 325 feet, Sonny.
- I know how far it is, Cliff.
753
00:58:13,341 --> 00:58:17,303
- Hell. It'd be a new world record.
- Wouldn't do my reputation any harm.
754
00:58:17,470 --> 00:58:19,263
Sonny, think of the risk.
755
00:58:19,430 --> 00:58:23,184
Forget about the risk, Max.
Just bring your checkbook.
756
00:58:23,351 --> 00:58:24,936
Huh?
757
00:58:25,103 --> 00:58:27,271
What's your fee for a gag like that?
758
00:58:28,689 --> 00:58:30,274
A hundred thousand dollars.
759
00:58:31,526 --> 00:58:34,028
Fifty thousand dollars for Ski...
760
00:58:34,195 --> 00:58:35,988
$50,000 for me.
761
00:58:36,155 --> 00:58:38,699
It's the world's biggest stunt.
762
00:58:39,659 --> 00:58:42,370
It ought to have
the world's biggest paycheck.
763
00:58:44,163 --> 00:58:48,251
Look, will you boys wait over there for a minute?
I want to discuss this with Roger.
764
00:58:48,417 --> 00:58:50,086
Of course, of course.
765
00:58:50,253 --> 00:58:51,462
You can do it, Cliff.
766
00:58:51,629 --> 00:58:55,383
Build a strong enough cage
so when we land on the other side...
767
00:58:55,550 --> 00:58:57,135
Roger...
768
00:58:57,301 --> 00:58:59,971
you know how much
over the budget we are.
769
00:59:00,138 --> 00:59:03,266
I want it, Max. It's right, and I want it.
770
00:59:03,432 --> 00:59:05,977
It's a stunt that's never been done.
771
00:59:06,936 --> 00:59:09,605
And what if they don't make it, Roger?
772
00:59:09,772 --> 00:59:13,276
- Are you gonna be responsible for it?
- I don't care. I want it.
773
00:59:13,442 --> 00:59:16,112
It's the ending I want.
It's the statement I want to make.
774
00:59:16,279 --> 00:59:19,323
Cut something else if you have to.
I want that stunt.
775
00:59:20,324 --> 00:59:22,076
All right, Roger.
776
00:59:23,744 --> 00:59:26,789
I'll talk to Sonny,
see if I can't get his price down.
777
00:59:26,956 --> 00:59:30,168
No offense, Max, but I
don't think you could.
778
00:59:30,334 --> 00:59:32,420
Hooper knows you too well.
779
00:59:32,587 --> 00:59:35,840
Tony will get him down. Won't you, Tony?
780
00:59:36,007 --> 00:59:37,884
It'll be a pleasure.
781
00:59:38,217 --> 00:59:41,762
I drove this sucker the other day
and it hauls ass. What'd you do to it?
782
00:59:41,929 --> 00:59:45,725
I put a 428 police interceptor in it.
Balanced and blueprinted.
783
00:59:45,892 --> 00:59:48,936
- It's plenty hot.
- If it's that hot, I could use it Friday night.
784
00:59:49,103 --> 00:59:51,397
- Listen up, listen up. Lead heads!
- What?
785
00:59:51,564 --> 00:59:54,317
- Any of you guys seen Hooper?
- Down here, short legs.
786
00:59:54,483 --> 00:59:55,735
- Hooper.
- Yeah?
787
00:59:55,902 --> 00:59:59,614
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Step in my office.
788
01:00:00,865 --> 01:00:04,410
Look, that gag you guys came up
with this morning...
789
01:00:04,577 --> 01:00:06,954
100,000 is way out of line.
790
01:00:07,121 --> 01:00:09,624
Mm-hm. Well, that's my price.
It's not negotiable.
791
01:00:09,790 --> 01:00:12,835
Heh. Everything is negotiable, Hooper.
792
01:00:13,002 --> 01:00:17,465
I know you're making big noises
just to jack up your fee, but here it is.
793
01:00:17,632 --> 01:00:19,842
Twenty grand for the jump.
794
01:00:20,009 --> 01:00:25,223
Because when you get right down to it,
that's all this is: Just another car jump.
795
01:00:25,389 --> 01:00:26,390
Really?
796
01:00:33,898 --> 01:00:35,775
Better fasten your seat belt.
797
01:00:36,192 --> 01:00:37,652
What the hell are you doing?
798
01:00:37,818 --> 01:00:41,113
I'm just thinking over your offer.
I think better when I'm driving.
799
01:00:44,492 --> 01:00:46,911
Hooper, don't get excited.
Maybe we can compromise.
800
01:00:50,706 --> 01:00:52,124
I never compromise.
801
01:00:52,291 --> 01:00:55,836
Life is too short. So are you.
802
01:01:01,217 --> 01:01:04,303
- Maybe we got off on the wrong foot, Hooper.
- I don't think so.
803
01:01:08,808 --> 01:01:11,811
- Oh, Jesus!
- It's just another car jump.
804
01:01:20,278 --> 01:01:23,614
- Did you enjoy that?
- No. No.
805
01:01:31,205 --> 01:01:33,332
- Hey, Sonny!
- Hi, Jane!
806
01:01:33,499 --> 01:01:35,126
You'll work with anybody!
807
01:01:35,293 --> 01:01:37,253
Ah, I love Westerns. Whoo!
808
01:01:39,130 --> 01:01:40,840
Look out! Here comes the wild man!
809
01:01:48,472 --> 01:01:52,351
- Price is 100 grand.
- A hundred grand will be just fine.
810
01:01:53,686 --> 01:01:56,689
- You okay, Hoop?
- Oh, yeah. Just couldn't be better.
811
01:01:56,856 --> 01:01:59,442
Tony might get a little sick in a second.
812
01:02:48,115 --> 01:02:50,034
He had a stroke.
813
01:02:50,576 --> 01:02:52,203
A stroke?
814
01:02:52,870 --> 01:02:54,205
Yeah.
815
01:02:55,748 --> 01:02:59,251
He says he fell down in the shower
and broke his knee.
816
01:03:00,252 --> 01:03:02,338
The dumb jerk.
817
01:03:02,505 --> 01:03:06,133
Even when they tell him it's a stroke,
he won't accept it.
818
01:03:07,968 --> 01:03:09,470
Come on.
819
01:03:13,140 --> 01:03:14,809
How is he now?
820
01:03:15,434 --> 01:03:16,894
I don't know.
821
01:03:19,146 --> 01:03:21,774
They shot him full of Demerol.
822
01:03:26,237 --> 01:03:30,699
Stupid old bastard. He's so damn stubborn.
823
01:04:01,063 --> 01:04:03,899
- Jocko?
- Jesus Christ.
824
01:04:04,066 --> 01:04:05,401
Hey.
825
01:04:05,943 --> 01:04:08,779
- Ain't this a bitch?
- Mm.
826
01:04:08,946 --> 01:04:10,614
What happened?
827
01:04:11,115 --> 01:04:12,366
Well...
828
01:04:12,533 --> 01:04:18,205
35 years of falling off horses and
airplanes and every goddamn thing else...
829
01:04:18,372 --> 01:04:20,958
I gotta go and do a brodie
in my own toilet.
830
01:04:23,502 --> 01:04:25,171
You're gonna be all right, Jocko.
831
01:04:33,846 --> 01:04:35,764
You know what a priest told me one time?
832
01:04:37,057 --> 01:04:38,350
No, what?
833
01:04:39,977 --> 01:04:44,732
This priest says to me,
"Son, your body is a temple."
834
01:04:44,899 --> 01:04:49,862
Heh. Hell of a goddamn way
to treat a temple, ain't it?
835
01:04:50,029 --> 01:04:51,822
Horses stepping all over it...
836
01:04:51,989 --> 01:04:57,077
stagecoaches dragging it all through
rocks and cactus and all kinds of shit...
837
01:04:57,912 --> 01:04:59,455
Eh...
838
01:05:00,623 --> 01:05:03,417
Then I spend the rest of my time...
839
01:05:03,584 --> 01:05:07,046
laying around waiting
for something to heal.
840
01:05:07,838 --> 01:05:09,673
You know what I'm talking about, don't you?
841
01:05:10,508 --> 01:05:12,801
Well...
842
01:05:13,594 --> 01:05:14,845
what for?
843
01:05:15,846 --> 01:05:17,973
Can you tell me what for?
844
01:05:18,140 --> 01:05:22,269
- Well, I think, Jock...
- I don't want to hear all that now, Sonny.
845
01:05:22,436 --> 01:05:25,856
Goddamn, you're a talkative son of a bitch.
846
01:05:27,691 --> 01:05:32,988
Temple's all busted to shit,
and all you can do is keep on talking.
847
01:05:54,426 --> 01:05:56,887
Did the doctor say anything to you?
848
01:05:57,638 --> 01:05:59,139
Yeah.
849
01:06:00,599 --> 01:06:03,644
They said they don't know
if he'll be able to walk again.
850
01:06:08,524 --> 01:06:10,693
Well, I'll tell you something, Gwenny.
851
01:06:12,778 --> 01:06:15,990
I'm quitting after this picture.
I'm not doing any more stunts.
852
01:06:16,156 --> 01:06:18,450
I'm going to hang it up.
853
01:06:20,035 --> 01:06:21,912
I love you.
854
01:06:22,079 --> 01:06:25,457
I'm gonna make so much money
on this job anyway, I can...
855
01:06:26,292 --> 01:06:28,419
pay off the ranch.
856
01:06:29,670 --> 01:06:31,422
Stock it.
857
01:06:33,549 --> 01:06:35,175
We'll be in high cotton.
858
01:06:35,342 --> 01:06:37,970
Heh. I love you.
859
01:06:40,431 --> 01:06:42,057
What'd you say?
860
01:06:42,808 --> 01:06:44,518
I said, I love you.
861
01:06:47,646 --> 01:06:49,523
I love you too.
862
01:07:02,119 --> 01:07:04,413
Oh. Oh.
863
01:07:04,580 --> 01:07:06,749
You better save some tequila for breakfast.
864
01:07:06,915 --> 01:07:09,752
Oh, yeah, that's a good idea. Heh.
Come on in.
865
01:07:09,918 --> 01:07:12,755
Where in the hell have you been?
I've been waiting.
866
01:07:12,921 --> 01:07:14,923
- We were at the hospital, Cully.
- Oh?
867
01:07:15,090 --> 01:07:17,801
- Dad had a stroke.
- A stroke?
868
01:07:18,260 --> 01:07:19,803
Really?
869
01:07:19,970 --> 01:07:22,765
- Is he all right?
- He's gonna be all right.
870
01:07:22,931 --> 01:07:25,267
Oh, I'm sorry, Gwen.
871
01:07:25,934 --> 01:07:28,979
- God, Cully, you look perfectly awful.
- Oh, I am. I am.
872
01:07:29,146 --> 01:07:32,816
- I'll get you some supper.
- No, wait, wait, wait. Nothing to eat.
873
01:07:34,485 --> 01:07:37,613
I got fired, heh,
so I came by to say goodbye.
874
01:07:38,447 --> 01:07:42,701
- Fired? What are you talking about?
- Well, see, they were over budget...
875
01:07:42,868 --> 01:07:45,412
and they wanted to get rid
of some of the deadwood.
876
01:07:45,579 --> 01:07:48,332
- My Wood's dead. Heh.
- Who fired you? Max?
877
01:07:48,999 --> 01:07:50,084
Uh...
878
01:07:50,250 --> 01:07:51,669
I don't really know.
879
01:07:51,835 --> 01:07:57,049
But I got the word
from that little popcorn fart, Tony.
880
01:07:59,093 --> 01:08:00,511
- Oh, no, no.
- Shut up.
881
01:08:00,678 --> 01:08:03,972
Nobody can hire and fire anybody on this...
What are you doing? Come on.
882
01:08:04,139 --> 01:08:06,809
I told them if they fired you,
they'd have to fire me.
883
01:08:06,975 --> 01:08:10,312
- Did you tell them that? I appreciate that.
- Yes, I told them that.
884
01:08:10,479 --> 01:08:14,400
You little rascal. That's why I love you.
We do things for each other.
885
01:08:14,566 --> 01:08:17,236
- I'm gonna do something for you now.
- Do something for me.
886
01:08:17,403 --> 01:08:20,155
Good advice. Get off the damn
picture before you get hurt.
887
01:08:20,322 --> 01:08:23,867
Cully, he told me this is his last picture.
After this, no more.
888
01:08:24,034 --> 01:08:26,912
Oh, sure, if there's anything left of him
after this picture.
889
01:08:27,079 --> 01:08:29,331
- Cully.
- What does that mean?
890
01:08:30,207 --> 01:08:32,459
- Oh. You didn't tell her?
- No, I didn't.
891
01:08:32,626 --> 01:08:34,586
He didn't tell you? Naughty, naughty.
892
01:08:34,753 --> 01:08:37,965
He didn't tell you
about the big bad rocket-car stunt?
893
01:08:38,132 --> 01:08:40,801
- Will you stop it?
- No. What stunt?
894
01:08:40,968 --> 01:08:43,178
Oh. Well, I'm gonna let
him fill in the details.
895
01:08:43,345 --> 01:08:45,931
Mind your own business.
Just drink your tequila.
896
01:08:46,098 --> 01:08:49,309
I do want to tell you one thing
while I'm still drunk on your tequila.
897
01:08:49,476 --> 01:08:52,354
- Shit. Oh, shit.
- I went to see his doctor.
898
01:08:52,521 --> 01:08:56,525
I went to see his doctor,
asked him what's going to happen to him...
899
01:08:56,692 --> 01:09:00,279
when he lands that rocket car
over there across the gorge...
900
01:09:00,446 --> 01:09:03,282
- ...how hard it's gonna hit.
- Sonny, what is he talking about?
901
01:09:03,449 --> 01:09:06,952
He's talking about $50,000 over and above
what I'll make on this picture.
902
01:09:07,119 --> 01:09:09,621
- Oh.
- Besides, I can't let that kid do the stunt alone.
903
01:09:09,788 --> 01:09:11,582
The kid? What...? What is this?
904
01:09:11,749 --> 01:09:13,792
You've got Ski in this crazy thing now?
905
01:09:13,959 --> 01:09:17,045
No, Gwenny, it's the other way around.
The kid's got him.
906
01:09:17,212 --> 01:09:19,923
- Will you butt out?
- I told you that kid was gonna get you killed.
907
01:09:21,133 --> 01:09:24,511
Sonny, you told me you were quitting
after this picture...
908
01:09:24,678 --> 01:09:27,431
so you could trade it off
against doing this stunt. True?
909
01:09:27,598 --> 01:09:31,018
You're crazy, you know that?
I'll tell you one thing. You're crazy.
910
01:09:31,185 --> 01:09:33,270
- I don't want to hear your...
- No!
911
01:09:33,437 --> 01:09:35,355
- Dumb jackass!
- Shut your drunken mouth!
912
01:09:35,522 --> 01:09:39,109
- Listen, don't mess up my wardrobe.
- Hey! Sonny!
913
01:09:43,572 --> 01:09:45,032
Oh.
914
01:09:45,199 --> 01:09:47,785
Hundred and seventy-two
motion-picture fights.
915
01:09:47,951 --> 01:09:50,412
That's the first time he ever hit me.
916
01:09:50,579 --> 01:09:52,873
That son of a bitch can hit. Heh.
917
01:09:53,040 --> 01:09:56,543
- Cully, I'm so sorry.
- Oh, he didn't mean it.
918
01:09:56,710 --> 01:09:59,421
If he had meant it, he'd
have hit a lot harder.
919
01:10:00,547 --> 01:10:02,007
He's hurting, Gwenny.
920
01:10:03,383 --> 01:10:06,011
He's got a lot of things on his mind.
921
01:10:07,930 --> 01:10:09,890
Oh, Cully.
922
01:10:15,646 --> 01:10:18,732
- Sonny.
- Mm?
923
01:10:21,985 --> 01:10:24,154
Sonny, will you go home now?
924
01:10:28,826 --> 01:10:30,327
Why?
925
01:10:30,786 --> 01:10:32,621
Please?
926
01:10:33,288 --> 01:10:34,790
Sonny.
927
01:10:37,876 --> 01:10:39,336
I'm sorry. Heh, heh.
928
01:10:39,503 --> 01:10:42,464
Sonny, what are you trying to prove?
929
01:10:42,631 --> 01:10:45,217
Let me ask you something, Debbie.
930
01:10:45,384 --> 01:10:47,845
This is a big town, isn't it?
931
01:10:48,011 --> 01:10:51,014
- I mean, Los Angeles is a big town.
- Yeah.
932
01:10:51,181 --> 01:10:56,436
Well, why the hell does this bar close
before the bars in Tulsa?
933
01:10:58,230 --> 01:11:00,190
Can you answer me that?
934
01:11:00,899 --> 01:11:02,818
I don't know, Sonny.
935
01:11:03,694 --> 01:11:07,447
Hey, let's go somewhere
and have some breakfast. You want to?
936
01:11:09,867 --> 01:11:11,660
I can't do that.
937
01:11:12,286 --> 01:11:14,997
Let's go somewhere and have some lunch.
938
01:11:15,956 --> 01:11:18,292
I can't do that either.
939
01:11:19,543 --> 01:11:23,547
Well, let's go somewhere
and jump each other's bones.
940
01:11:24,381 --> 01:11:26,675
- Aah.
- Hmm?
941
01:11:27,634 --> 01:11:30,554
- That is tempting, Sonny. Yeah.
- Ls it?
942
01:11:30,721 --> 01:11:33,223
- But you know why I can't do it?
- Why?
943
01:11:33,390 --> 01:11:38,687
Because my husband
is so jealous and so near.
944
01:11:40,272 --> 01:11:41,857
And so big.
945
01:11:42,024 --> 01:11:43,025
Sonny...
946
01:11:48,322 --> 01:11:50,032
Hey - Huh?
947
01:11:50,198 --> 01:11:53,368
When you get so drunk you make a pass
at Debbie in my presence...
948
01:11:53,535 --> 01:11:55,621
- ...it's time for me to call you a cab.
- Yeah.
949
01:11:55,787 --> 01:11:59,249
You don't call me a cab. I am a cab.
You don't need to call me a cab.
950
01:11:59,416 --> 01:12:04,755
I'm perfectly able to
take a walk or ride...
951
01:12:04,922 --> 01:12:08,008
or fly or whatever.
Anything you want me to do, I can do.
952
01:12:08,175 --> 01:12:10,761
- I'm perfectly coordinated.
- Sonny.
953
01:12:11,261 --> 01:12:14,264
So bye-bye and so long.
954
01:14:21,349 --> 01:14:22,934
You said you could do it.
955
01:14:23,101 --> 01:14:26,396
I rewrote the script
because you said you could do it.
956
01:14:26,563 --> 01:14:29,107
We rearranged the shooting schedule.
957
01:14:29,274 --> 01:14:32,152
We spent a damn fortune
preparing for that stunt...
958
01:14:32,319 --> 01:14:34,738
because you said you could do it.
959
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:38,825
- I was wrong, Roger. I'm sorry.
- You were wrong.
960
01:14:38,992 --> 01:14:42,329
He was wrong, Max. He's sorry.
961
01:14:42,496 --> 01:14:47,834
He blows the whole goddamn movie
and he says, "Gee, I was wrong. Sorry."
962
01:14:50,378 --> 01:14:52,255
Okay, okay. New business.
963
01:14:52,422 --> 01:14:56,343
- Ski does it with someone else, that's all.
- Why don't you forget it, Roger?
964
01:14:56,510 --> 01:14:58,386
I never liked the damn gag anyhow.
965
01:14:58,553 --> 01:15:00,806
- Who else can do the stunt?
- Buddy Joe can do it.
966
01:15:00,972 --> 01:15:02,933
- He's not available.
- Who else?
967
01:15:03,100 --> 01:15:04,518
Nobody.
968
01:15:05,060 --> 01:15:09,064
- What do you mean, nobody?
- I mean nobody. It's a very complicated stunt.
969
01:15:09,231 --> 01:15:12,234
There's maybe three guys that can do it,
and we're not available.
970
01:15:12,400 --> 01:15:14,402
Ski will do it solo with a dummy, then.
971
01:15:16,071 --> 01:15:19,825
Goddamn, Roger. If you knew
what the hell you were talking about...
972
01:15:19,991 --> 01:15:22,327
you'd realize it takes two guys
to do the stunt.
973
01:15:22,494 --> 01:15:25,122
One guy to drive,
one guy to read the instruments.
974
01:15:25,288 --> 01:15:27,457
And I'm telling you that
Ski isn't qualified.
975
01:15:29,626 --> 01:15:32,629
Max, does this man still have a job
on this picture?
976
01:15:32,796 --> 01:15:35,799
Sonny works here as long as I say so.
977
01:15:35,966 --> 01:15:38,635
Or as long as Sonny wants to.
978
01:15:39,261 --> 01:15:40,762
Thank you, Max.
979
01:15:40,929 --> 01:15:43,765
Now, if Sonny says Ski can't do it,
I believe him.
980
01:15:43,932 --> 01:15:46,476
It's only a damn movie anyhow,
for God's sake.
981
01:15:49,354 --> 01:15:51,731
Only a movie?
982
01:15:51,898 --> 01:15:54,359
I want you to call the studio brass.
983
01:15:54,526 --> 01:15:57,696
I want you to tell them
and their stockholders, distributors...
984
01:15:57,863 --> 01:16:00,949
and the bank that it's only a movie.
Will you do that, Max?
985
01:16:01,116 --> 01:16:04,536
I want you to tell them, "Forget about
all your money. It's only a movie."
986
01:16:04,703 --> 01:16:08,081
I'll tell them that no damn movie
is worth a man's life!
987
01:16:09,541 --> 01:16:13,670
And I'll tell them unless I can shoot
this picture the way I want to...
988
01:16:13,837 --> 01:16:17,382
and that means this stunt,
then I take a walk.
989
01:16:18,508 --> 01:16:22,512
And we'll see who walks,
Mr. Berns, you or I.
990
01:16:27,350 --> 01:16:29,311
I'm sorry, Max.
991
01:16:29,978 --> 01:16:32,814
Ah, what the hell, Sonny. What the hell.
992
01:16:35,358 --> 01:16:37,402
You know the old saying:
993
01:16:37,569 --> 01:16:40,572
You'll never work in this town again.
994
01:16:40,739 --> 01:16:42,073
- Ha, ha.
- Hmm.
995
01:16:42,240 --> 01:16:44,034
Unless they need you.
996
01:16:58,840 --> 01:17:01,635
- Here you go, Cully.
- Thanks. A Coke?
997
01:17:02,385 --> 01:17:04,985
- If you're still mad, I can just leave...
- Shut up and sit down.
998
01:17:08,683 --> 01:17:11,770
Kind of early in the day
for that hard stuff, isn't it?
999
01:17:12,604 --> 01:17:15,732
I'm working out my left arm this morning.
1000
01:17:15,899 --> 01:17:18,902
I'll get around to my
right arm this afternoon.
1001
01:17:21,738 --> 01:17:25,533
You heard what's happening, haven't you?
I'll tell you what's happening.
1002
01:17:25,700 --> 01:17:28,995
That new kid, Ski?
Well, they've got him gaffing the show.
1003
01:17:30,330 --> 01:17:35,043
You know what else? I'll tell you what else.
They canceled that car stunt.
1004
01:17:35,210 --> 01:17:36,503
At least temporarily.
1005
01:17:36,670 --> 01:17:39,005
You were absolutely right,
it's a two-man stunt.
1006
01:17:39,172 --> 01:17:43,468
Ain't nobody crazy enough to ride with that
kid, with a rocket strapped to his butt.
1007
01:17:43,635 --> 01:17:46,721
And you can bet your ass,
your cowboy hat and your house oat...
1008
01:17:46,888 --> 01:17:49,933
they're gonna be coming after you
to get you to do the stunt.
1009
01:17:50,642 --> 01:17:52,394
You gonna do the stunt?
1010
01:17:53,520 --> 01:17:55,605
You know what, Cully?
1011
01:17:57,649 --> 01:18:01,027
There's a whole new breed
of stuntman coming along.
1012
01:18:02,404 --> 01:18:04,072
They're younger and...
1013
01:18:04,948 --> 01:18:06,825
stronger...
1014
01:18:08,034 --> 01:18:10,453
tougher than us.
1015
01:18:10,620 --> 01:18:13,915
They don't take pills, they don't drink...
1016
01:18:14,082 --> 01:18:17,877
they don't... They don't take shots.
1017
01:18:18,044 --> 01:18:20,797
They use little pocket calculators.
1018
01:18:22,257 --> 01:18:25,719
If we don't watch out,
they're gonna blow us right out of the tub.
1019
01:18:27,095 --> 01:18:29,764
You didn't answer my question.
Are you gonna do the stunt?
1020
01:18:34,477 --> 01:18:38,523
Boy, I never realized there were
so many gags at the end of the picture.
1021
01:18:38,690 --> 01:18:40,275
So involved.
1022
01:18:40,442 --> 01:18:44,988
Fire gags, the whole town being blown up,
50 stuntmen doing falls.
1023
01:18:48,283 --> 01:18:50,035
All right, Max.
1024
01:18:51,536 --> 01:18:54,331
What's the real reason you came out here?
1025
01:18:54,497 --> 01:18:57,292
To ask me to come back and gaff the show?
1026
01:18:58,543 --> 01:19:00,962
No, it's the rocket-car gag, Sonny.
1027
01:19:01,921 --> 01:19:05,884
The rocket car? - It's a two-man
job, just like you always said.
1028
01:19:06,051 --> 01:19:07,886
Nobody in town will touch it.
1029
01:19:08,053 --> 01:19:11,348
- Roger's worried that Ski will get hurt.
- That's a lot of bullshit.
1030
01:19:11,514 --> 01:19:14,059
Roger's worried about getting his shot.
1031
01:19:14,684 --> 01:19:17,562
Roger's worried about
finishing his picture.
1032
01:19:17,729 --> 01:19:22,400
So he talked you into coming out here
to ask me to come back and do the gag.
1033
01:19:22,984 --> 01:19:25,695
You tell Roger to go sit on a short stick.
1034
01:19:25,862 --> 01:19:28,448
- If you won't do it for Roger...
- I'll do it for you?
1035
01:19:28,615 --> 01:19:31,368
- I'd appreciate it.
- You'd appreciate it?
1036
01:19:33,912 --> 01:19:37,499
What happened to you, Max?
You used to be tough.
1037
01:19:38,500 --> 01:19:40,502
Nobody could tell you how
to make a picture.
1038
01:19:41,169 --> 01:19:42,921
And nobody got hurt on your pictures.
1039
01:19:43,088 --> 01:19:45,215
If I don't deliver this picture...
1040
01:19:45,382 --> 01:19:49,844
I'll be the producer who blew
the biggest and hottest project in town.
1041
01:19:51,596 --> 01:19:53,890
All washed up. Finished.
1042
01:19:54,057 --> 01:19:57,143
I'm too old to go back
to selling door-to-door.
1043
01:20:13,576 --> 01:20:15,703
Okay, Max.
1044
01:20:18,331 --> 01:20:19,582
You got me.
1045
01:20:43,106 --> 01:20:44,816
You gonna do it?
1046
01:20:46,443 --> 01:20:47,819
Yeah.
1047
01:20:50,780 --> 01:20:52,115
I'm gonna do it.
1048
01:20:55,452 --> 01:20:57,954
I won't be here when you get back.
1049
01:21:20,602 --> 01:21:23,229
- Hey, Sonny! How you doing, my man?
- Jeffrey.
1050
01:21:23,396 --> 01:21:25,356
- Gary.
- How's it hanging, Sonny?
1051
01:21:25,523 --> 01:21:28,026
- Hi, Sonny. Max said you were coming in.
- Danny.
1052
01:21:28,193 --> 01:21:30,236
Nice to see you back.
1053
01:21:30,403 --> 01:21:32,739
What do you think of my baby?
1054
01:21:32,906 --> 01:21:34,157
It's big.
1055
01:21:34,324 --> 01:21:36,367
Looks like one of King Kong's
suppositories.
1056
01:21:39,329 --> 01:21:42,624
- How you doing, Ski?
- Fine, Sonny. How about you?
1057
01:21:42,790 --> 01:21:44,375
Good.
1058
01:21:44,542 --> 01:21:47,128
Let me tell you guys
how this thing works.
1059
01:21:47,295 --> 01:21:49,672
Now, Sonny,
your job is to dial up the pressure.
1060
01:21:49,839 --> 01:21:54,344
You'll need 1500 pounds,
and that leaves Ski free to drive.
1061
01:21:54,511 --> 01:21:58,681
When the pressure's right,
hit the switch, and you are gone.
1062
01:21:58,848 --> 01:22:01,059
- How's it handle?
- Haven't driven it yet.
1063
01:22:02,602 --> 01:22:04,604
- Let's try it out.
- I heard that.
1064
01:22:19,160 --> 01:22:20,495
How's it feel?
1065
01:22:20,662 --> 01:22:22,705
Pulls a little to the left.
1066
01:22:23,373 --> 01:22:24,916
Anything else?
1067
01:22:25,083 --> 01:22:27,418
That cigarette lighter don't work.
1068
01:22:29,879 --> 01:22:33,299
You just better hope that
that cigarette lighter works.
1069
01:22:40,932 --> 01:22:43,476
We'll be following the explosive truck.
1070
01:22:43,643 --> 01:22:46,020
The driver will jump out, and it'll blow.
1071
01:22:46,187 --> 01:22:49,816
Supposed to collapse the bridge
from the super structure to the other bank.
1072
01:22:53,987 --> 01:22:58,408
You figure out on that pocket calculator
how many G's we're pulling when we land?
1073
01:22:58,575 --> 01:23:00,910
Eight to 10 if we land on our wheels.
1074
01:23:01,077 --> 01:23:03,246
We gotta make sure
we hit the ramp just right...
1075
01:23:03,413 --> 01:23:05,748
otherwise it'd veer off one way
or the other...
1076
01:23:05,915 --> 01:23:08,001
or could just go head
first into that bank.
1077
01:23:08,167 --> 01:23:11,129
- If that happens, there's just one thing to do.
- What's that?
1078
01:23:11,296 --> 01:23:14,465
Put your head between your legs
and kiss your ass goodbye.
1079
01:23:16,759 --> 01:23:18,344
It's a piece of cake.
1080
01:23:24,892 --> 01:23:26,853
I'll buy you a drink.
1081
01:23:27,020 --> 01:23:29,188
You don't drink, do you?
1082
01:23:29,355 --> 01:23:30,898
I'm willing to start.
1083
01:23:31,065 --> 01:23:32,942
Damn good time to do it.
1084
01:23:35,111 --> 01:23:36,988
You know...
1085
01:23:37,155 --> 01:23:40,992
all this hanging around with you,
I think you're starting to rub off on me.
1086
01:23:41,159 --> 01:23:43,870
- How's that?
- Well, a couple ways.
1087
01:23:45,246 --> 01:23:46,497
- Uh-huh.
- Excuse me.
1088
01:23:46,664 --> 01:23:50,168
My first marriage, you know,
is more than likely in the shitter.
1089
01:23:50,335 --> 01:23:51,794
Oh, yeah.
1090
01:23:52,670 --> 01:23:55,590
And I'm learning to drink and liking it.
1091
01:23:58,217 --> 01:24:01,095
Yeah, well...
1092
01:24:01,262 --> 01:24:05,141
my present relationship is not good.
1093
01:24:05,308 --> 01:24:07,185
Actually, it's in the shitter too.
1094
01:24:09,729 --> 01:24:14,192
Well, what the hell is it about stuntmen...
1095
01:24:14,359 --> 01:24:16,569
and their wives and relationships?
1096
01:24:16,736 --> 01:24:21,115
I don't know.
It's a little like drinking and driving.
1097
01:24:21,991 --> 01:24:24,452
Eventually there's gonna be
a hell of a wreck.
1098
01:24:24,619 --> 01:24:27,538
- Hey, guys.
- Hey. Oh, hey.
1099
01:24:28,498 --> 01:24:30,750
- Is this your car?
- Yeah.
1100
01:24:30,917 --> 01:24:33,586
- Looks pretty fast.
- Looks ain't deceiving.
1101
01:24:33,753 --> 01:24:38,841
From the looks of them beer cans,
I'd say you two guys were a little drunk.
1102
01:24:39,008 --> 01:24:42,512
Like I said, looks ain't
deceiving, you old fart.
1103
01:24:42,679 --> 01:24:44,764
Better let me handle this.
1104
01:24:44,931 --> 01:24:47,725
I hope you guys ain't planning
on doing any more driving.
1105
01:24:47,892 --> 01:24:50,937
We're not gonna do any more driving.
I just called my mother.
1106
01:24:51,104 --> 01:24:54,232
And she's gonna come out here
and pick us up and take us home.
1107
01:24:54,399 --> 01:24:56,526
I'm gonna leave the car here
and go home with her.
1108
01:24:58,194 --> 01:25:00,571
- Your mother?
- Yeah.
1109
01:25:00,738 --> 01:25:01,989
I hope you're right.
1110
01:25:05,827 --> 01:25:07,328
Old fart.
1111
01:25:07,495 --> 01:25:10,581
So the queen says to the photographer:
1112
01:25:10,748 --> 01:25:13,668
"I got a brother-in-law
that's a photographer."
1113
01:25:13,835 --> 01:25:17,296
The photographer says, "So?
I've got a brother-in-law that's a queen."
1114
01:25:19,966 --> 01:25:22,552
Oh. Look what we got here.
1115
01:25:22,719 --> 01:25:24,429
Howdy, old fart.
1116
01:25:26,472 --> 01:25:28,599
Afternoon, officer. Nice day, isn't it?
1117
01:25:29,350 --> 01:25:30,768
Pull up, right over there!
1118
01:25:31,394 --> 01:25:34,397
- What's that?
- I said, pull over up front!
1119
01:25:34,564 --> 01:25:37,275
- Pull over up front, that's what I said!
- Gotcha.
1120
01:25:37,442 --> 01:25:38,693
Shall we?
1121
01:25:40,445 --> 01:25:42,447
Say goodbye to the nice officer.
1122
01:25:43,072 --> 01:25:44,657
Bye-bye, nice officer.
1123
01:25:50,496 --> 01:25:52,623
Great God almighty!
1124
01:25:54,000 --> 01:25:55,793
Headquarters!
1125
01:25:57,295 --> 01:25:58,504
Never mind.
1126
01:25:58,838 --> 01:26:00,918
All right, Tony, I'm coming down.
1127
01:26:01,048 --> 01:26:03,676
Get Hooper and Ski ready, will you?
1128
01:26:03,843 --> 01:26:07,013
All right, move it out of here.
The helicopter's coming down.
1129
01:26:09,807 --> 01:26:12,435
Tony, do I have to do everything myself?
1130
01:26:12,602 --> 01:26:14,771
Get those people out of here.
1131
01:26:16,856 --> 01:26:19,734
Hooper! Ski! Get over here.
Roger wants you.
1132
01:26:20,735 --> 01:26:22,862
Let's go, let's go! Over here!
1133
01:26:31,496 --> 01:26:36,417
We'll be putting away this thing here.
We're gonna blow all this up.
1134
01:26:38,085 --> 01:26:43,257
As you remember, it's a giant earthquake,
you know, with fires, explosions...
1135
01:26:43,424 --> 01:26:46,844
buildings falling everywhere,
chaos, terror...
1136
01:26:47,011 --> 01:26:49,472
and you'll be driving through it.
1137
01:26:51,599 --> 01:26:54,435
It has a nice grayness, like La Strada.
1138
01:26:54,602 --> 01:26:57,522
All right, I'll be in the
chopper for all of this.
1139
01:26:57,688 --> 01:27:00,691
And we start back there
at the administration building.
1140
01:27:00,858 --> 01:27:03,569
When the earthquake hits,
we collapse the building.
1141
01:27:03,736 --> 01:27:07,281
That's a great idea, Roger.
That's gonna look terrific on film.
1142
01:27:07,448 --> 01:27:09,951
Now, this gas station is where...
1143
01:27:10,993 --> 01:27:15,540
you'll force one of those cars
chasing you to hit those pumps...
1144
01:27:15,706 --> 01:27:18,543
and that'll set off our main tank.
1145
01:27:19,877 --> 01:27:21,420
Sensational idea, Roger.
1146
01:27:21,587 --> 01:27:22,987
It's the only way it can be filmed.
1147
01:27:24,882 --> 01:27:26,843
Actually, you're quite wrong, Tony.
1148
01:27:27,009 --> 01:27:30,471
There are several ways of doing it,
but this is undoubtedly the best.
1149
01:27:30,638 --> 01:27:32,473
All right, Sonny, I'm depending on you.
1150
01:27:32,640 --> 01:27:37,019
I want some good stunts, some cars skidding,
other cars crashing into each other...
1151
01:27:37,186 --> 01:27:40,314
but these smokestacks are important.
1152
01:27:40,481 --> 01:27:45,069
When they fall, they demolish everything.
They've got to just miss your car.
1153
01:27:45,236 --> 01:27:47,154
That is crucial...
1154
01:27:47,321 --> 01:27:50,575
because we can't put those stacks
back together again.
1155
01:27:50,741 --> 01:27:52,285
That's right, Roger.
1156
01:27:52,451 --> 01:27:55,538
Here's where you find the explosives truck
that blows the bridge...
1157
01:27:55,705 --> 01:27:59,125
and of course,
your car will have to jump the river.
1158
01:28:06,757 --> 01:28:09,844
We'll go over here where we can get
a good view of the jump.
1159
01:28:10,011 --> 01:28:12,597
- It's good to see you.
- You've come for the jump, right?
1160
01:28:12,763 --> 01:28:14,473
- Yeah.
- It's gonna be neat. Later.
1161
01:28:14,640 --> 01:28:17,852
Hey, Gwen. Gwen. Do you want to see him?
1162
01:28:18,019 --> 01:28:19,478
No.
1163
01:28:20,563 --> 01:28:22,106
Afterward.
1164
01:28:28,112 --> 01:28:30,573
Roger wants to talk to you guys.
1165
01:28:31,324 --> 01:28:32,783
Yeah, Roger?
1166
01:28:32,950 --> 01:28:35,745
All right, Ski, Sonny, this is Roger.
You boys ready?
1167
01:28:35,912 --> 01:28:39,248
- We were born ready.
- Wonderful. Let's try one, shall we?
1168
01:28:40,333 --> 01:28:42,460
One's all you get, hoss.
1169
01:28:42,627 --> 01:28:45,504
- Good luck, guys.
- Hold this while we're gone, will you?
1170
01:28:45,671 --> 01:28:49,467
ROGER'. Remember, people, no one ever won
an Oscar for second best. So get ready.
1171
01:28:53,095 --> 01:28:56,807
- All right, this is it. Roll the cameras.
- Speed.
1172
01:28:56,974 --> 01:28:59,644
- Rolling cameras one through five.
- Six through nine.
1173
01:28:59,810 --> 01:29:03,022
- Eleven and 12.
- Action! Go, go, go!
1174
01:29:24,335 --> 01:29:26,545
We're up to pressure, 1500 pounds.
1175
01:29:34,595 --> 01:29:36,347
Goddamn. Cliff was working overtime.
1176
01:29:45,523 --> 01:29:47,900
We're losing... We're losing some pressure.
1177
01:29:48,067 --> 01:29:51,570
- Well, stick the thing up to full power!
- I already did that!
1178
01:29:51,737 --> 01:29:54,031
It's down, 1400 pounds.
1179
01:29:54,198 --> 01:29:56,033
- It just ain't enough.
- It better be.
1180
01:30:11,632 --> 01:30:13,134
Good, boy. You're doing great.
1181
01:30:35,698 --> 01:30:36,699
Woo-had.!
1182
01:30:44,331 --> 01:30:47,084
Holy shit. Your speed is right on.
1183
01:30:49,962 --> 01:30:51,714
- I love it! I love it! Ha-ha-ha!
- Whoo!
1184
01:31:04,226 --> 01:31:06,479
We're down to 1100 pounds pressure.
1185
01:31:06,645 --> 01:31:08,773
- We're in trouble now.
- Goddamn it, Sonny.
1186
01:31:30,419 --> 01:31:33,464
One more curve and they're gonna blow
that bridge all to shit!
1187
01:31:33,631 --> 01:31:36,008
Get on it, son! Put the pedal to the metal!
1188
01:31:45,726 --> 01:31:47,728
Get onto that explosives truck's ass!
1189
01:31:59,740 --> 01:32:01,367
What the hell's the matter?
1190
01:32:01,534 --> 01:32:03,828
- Haven't got enough pressure.
- Screw the pressure!
1191
01:32:09,959 --> 01:32:11,836
What is happening?
1192
01:32:13,129 --> 01:32:16,966
What the hell is going on down there?
Keep rolling, goddamn it!
1193
01:32:17,133 --> 01:32:19,301
My life's worth more than a piece of film.
1194
01:32:19,468 --> 01:32:23,264
I'll tell you exactly what your life is worth.
Your life is worth $50,000.
1195
01:32:23,430 --> 01:32:26,016
The price you put on it
when you got behind this wheel.
1196
01:32:26,183 --> 01:32:29,728
Sonny, Ski, if you do not try
to make this jump...
1197
01:32:29,895 --> 01:32:32,690
you'll never work in this town again.
Is that...?
1198
01:32:34,191 --> 01:32:36,735
- We're going, huh?
- We're going, yeah, we're going.
1199
01:32:36,902 --> 01:32:38,696
Heh. You're crazy.
1200
01:32:42,158 --> 01:32:44,076
- I'm gonna hit it.
- Whoo!
1201
01:32:44,243 --> 01:32:45,911
Whoo!
1202
01:33:01,468 --> 01:33:03,721
I just don't believe it.
1203
01:33:04,180 --> 01:33:09,310
Cut, cut, out! And print, goddamn it!
Get me down.
1204
01:33:16,692 --> 01:33:19,570
- Get that door open!
- And get that crowbar over here!
1205
01:33:20,487 --> 01:33:23,032
- Let me get in there.
- Can't get it open.
1206
01:33:23,574 --> 01:33:24,825
Get away.
1207
01:33:25,618 --> 01:33:28,037
Sonny, are you all right?
1208
01:33:28,704 --> 01:33:32,541
Sonny, are you all right? Sonny!
Jesus, Sonny!
1209
01:33:40,216 --> 01:33:42,468
- Yes, I know, I know, I know.
- He made it across!
1210
01:33:50,309 --> 01:33:51,727
Sonny.
1211
01:33:52,811 --> 01:33:54,230
Sonny.
1212
01:33:58,943 --> 01:34:00,945
Hey, hey, hey!
1213
01:34:06,784 --> 01:34:09,036
That was a hell of a jump!
1214
01:34:30,766 --> 01:34:32,726
Make room for Jocko.
1215
01:34:34,561 --> 01:34:38,232
- I'd like to take another look at that spot.
- Yeah, from this side.
1216
01:34:38,399 --> 01:34:41,235
You're just the greatest. I love you both.
1217
01:34:41,819 --> 01:34:46,448
- Gwen. Gwen, that was his best stunt ever.
- It was his last, Max.
1218
01:34:50,119 --> 01:34:53,163
- Zoom!
- Wild stunt.
1219
01:34:54,456 --> 01:34:56,542
Max, Max, we did it.
1220
01:34:56,709 --> 01:35:00,671
We just filmed the most extraordinary stunt
of all time, and we got it.
1221
01:35:00,838 --> 01:35:02,464
- Tony?
- Yeah, Max?
1222
01:35:02,631 --> 01:35:04,049
You're fired.
1223
01:35:04,216 --> 01:35:06,260
Right, Mr. Berns.
1224
01:35:27,448 --> 01:35:28,782
Spectacular.
1225
01:35:28,949 --> 01:35:31,952
Wonderful. I knew you could do it.
1226
01:35:32,119 --> 01:35:34,913
I never saw anything like it.
1227
01:35:35,080 --> 01:35:38,667
It was wonderful. What can I say?
It was wonderful.
1228
01:35:38,834 --> 01:35:42,004
Hooper, can I speak to you for a sec?
1229
01:35:50,888 --> 01:35:54,308
Look, I know we didn't get along
on this picture.
1230
01:35:54,475 --> 01:35:57,144
I also know you think
I'm a tyrannical egomaniac.
1231
01:35:58,687 --> 01:36:00,814
Well, maybe it's true...
1232
01:36:00,981 --> 01:36:04,276
but films are tiny pieces of time...
1233
01:36:04,443 --> 01:36:06,862
and we captured it.
1234
01:36:07,029 --> 01:36:08,614
I only do it for one reason.
1235
01:36:08,781 --> 01:36:11,909
To make the best movie I can...
1236
01:36:12,076 --> 01:36:15,162
because I'm a pro just like you.
1237
01:36:15,329 --> 01:36:17,831
I'm also big enough to apologize...
1238
01:36:17,998 --> 01:36:21,543
and I know you're big enough to accept.
1239
01:36:24,880 --> 01:36:26,382
Well, Roger...
1240
01:36:27,383 --> 01:36:28,884
as usual...
1241
01:36:31,095 --> 01:36:33,222
you're wrong.